Seasons change

Chapter 1

I have never understood imaginations. Nor will i ever. Maybe someday that will change, maybe someday i could feel that feeling again. That feeling where you can dream up anything and make a story out of it. The thinkers just dont allow it. I have never known why. Spade sits down next to me. "What are you thinking about?" He asks. I havent spoken to him in days. I didnt know if anything had happened, or if it was just a thing. I had almost forgotten about him, which is surprising considering we have been best peers since birth. We have to say peers because the thinkers wont allow us to say the word "friends". My mother has told me about that word once, but i have never known what it means. "The thinkers dont believe in friends." She had told me. At this point, its as if i dont know anything anymore, including who i am. Spade tilted his head. "Are you going to answer me? Or are you just ignoring me." I looked up at him as if to say, '"Why would i be ignoring you?" I suddenly realized that his eyes were blue. I had always thought they were hazel, but instead there was this blue and orange in his eyes. They were magnificent. "I am not ignoring you," i finally responded. "Im just creating thoughts." Spade let out a small laugh, almost a giggle, except deep and tough. I did not understand what was so funny, but i smiled anyway. He put his hand on my finger. I had not been touched in a long while. The last time i had been touched was by my mother when i left to get on the train to go to the season cermony. "Im scared too..." Spade said as i let my head drop on his shoulder. "Its going to be fine Creccia."

Today we will be assigned our seasons. I have always waited for this day, yet i had always been terrified it would come. My father used to be one of the thinkers who assigned us the seasons. We call them the owners. I wander if they are called that because they own more than we do. Sometimes i think that maybe they know how to imagine. But the thinkers made me like this. A girl with the name of Creccia, with long brown hair and big green eyes, who can't imagine, who can't dream. "Ten minutes." A young man told us. He must work at the front of the train. I burrow my face into Spade's thick suit. The males are required to dress accordingly to the occasion. Suits, ties, jackets, they must get overheated in those dreadful outfits. The females are required to wear a long satin dress, which we were allowed to choose the color. I remember when my mother took me to go look at the different types of dresses. When i saw the red one, i knew i was in love. But i also knew i could only wear it one night, so i have to treasure my time with this gorgeous dress. It looked good on me. I could tell Spade flinched a little when i put my face in his suit, so i pulled away. Maybe i hurt him. "Its okay." He says softly, as he pulls me back toward him. I have never felt so relaxed in my entire life, nor have i felt so horrified. I hold the corner of my dress in my hands, feeling my way around the material. It was so smooth. "You look ravishing Creccia." Spade says as he twirls my hair around his finger. It kind of hurt, but i didnt complain. "You dont look so bad yourself." I responded playfuly, even though i wasnt in a very playful mood. He smiled. Good god he looked amazing. But i knew i couldnt stare at him. It would send a bad message. So i just looked out the window, staring at the trees and nature outside instead of Spade. So i just kept my thoughts to myself, letting my best friend hold me.