Satellite Heart

Chapter 8 | It's All Love

TW - Very brief mention of anxiety/death in this chapter, it's very mild and not graphic, but I'd prefer letting you guys know in case some of you are sensitive to this 😊 

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J's POV 💫

I am drunk. 

I lost count after the fourth tequila shot, my throat completely numb after the strain the amber elixir put it through. 

To say I'm surprised I haven't thrown it all up already is an understatement, since I have not pushed these kind of boundaries for years. But I am having fun... Right?

Right. My hands grip the bathroom washbowl, partially because I lost my balance along the way, but also because I am trying my hardest to keep the panic rising within me at bay. All I need right now is to feel grounded by any means possible, and right now that means holding onto my surroundings before I lose my sanity.

The music is loud in the background, only slightly muffled by the noise of the water slowly coming out of the tap, and the sound of my heart pounding against my chest. I am definitely going to be sick tonight.

I slowly let my hands meet the cool water, the liquid gliding between my fingers for a good minute. I need to get my head back to the present, back to Xander and this odd gathering. I shakily bring my hands to my mouth, feeling the roughness of my lips under my finger tips. After taking a big breath, I splash the water on my face, the cold water harshly hitting me and causing a painful exhale to come out of my mouth.

"Good things come to those who wait pal!" I think to myself.

I groan, the memory of the video I sent earlier repeating in my head on a loop. "What the hell is wrong with me?!" I mutter frustratingly, while rubbing my face with my hands. "What the fuck Juliette, huh? You think you're a big shot?" I groan, barely able to recognise my own voice, as it is comes laboured and hoarse from all the singing and the alcohol I gulped down the past three hours.

A loud knock on the bathroom door startles me and interrupts my inner monologue and thankfully my imminent spiralling. I was stuck between wanting to remain locked in Arthur's grandma's bathroom and its  rose and juniper potpourri smell, or going back out there and annihilating all thoughts altogether. 

It was all or nothing at that stage.

Another loud knock resonates in the bathroom, no longer taking me by surprise.

"Juliette? Are you alright in there?" 

Xander.

I quickly grab a towel and dry my face, fumbling with the door lock and stumbling in the process, my body still shaking from the adrenaline rushing through my veins. I quickly open the door before my best friend decides to take it off its hinges himself. God only knows how long I have been in this room and what he thought I have been doing in my drunken state.

"I'm fine." I grumble, walking past him. "You should maybe have a drink too, try to have fun." I poke my tongue in his direction, using his words against him. My usual filters were definitely nowhere to be found. Anyone else might take it badly, but not Xander.