Dissonance and Harmony

His Turn

Carter

I hear Ryan take a deep breath and sit up. I'm trying hard not to think of her laying on her bed while I talk to her. It will not help me focus on the conversation.

"Go for it," Ryan says.

"Ok, question 1: Why do you like me?" I smile knowing that I'm throwing her question back at her.

"Jugular, huh?" she says, wryly.

"Yup," I reply, smiling wider.

"Well, you know that I've liked you for a while. I was initially attracted to your looks."

"You think I'm hot?" I tease.

"Cute."

"Cute!" I say, laughing, trying to sound offended

"Cute," she affirms, the smile evident in her voice. "But, since I've gotten to know you, I've found that you have an excellent sense of humor, you are very sweet and caring, and you don't seem to care about popularity."

"That's true. It doesn't really matter to me."

"Ok, what's next?"

I chuckle. I didn't know that she could be so forceful. I like it.

"Ok, why don't I ever see you at any parties? I know you've been invited."

"Um..." she hesitates. I hear her shifting on her bed. "I don't really feel comfortable at parties. I don't like the pressure to have fun and that there are certain expectations, especially for couples."

I'm puzzled. What is she talking about - expectations? "What do you mean?"

"Is that your next question?"

"No. Just getting clarification."

"In my experience, guys often expect specific things to happen sexually at parties, whether you're ready or not." Her voice is quiet.

"Ryan, I don't know who you've gone to parties with, but that should never be the expectation," I say, a little forcefully.

"I know that, now." Her voice is still quiet and I can tell there is something I don't know behind those words.

I'm about to ask more about that, but she clears her throat. "Ok, next?"

Ok. I need to back off right now. She's not ready to talk about that with me. Let's lighten it up a bit. "Question 3: What do you do with your friends instead of partying?"

I immediately hear her tone lighten and I'm glad that I changed up my questioning. "Well, we do whatever people typically do: go out to eat, movies, shopping, hang out, sleepover. The usual."

There is a brief pause in the conversation before she teasingly says, "Come on, Carter. I know there are harder questions you must have."

"Ok," I laugh. "Why are you so cold and sarcastic to me sometimes?"

She takes a deep breath. "Well, with the way that Patrick tormented me for years and other things that have happened, I thought it would be better not to get too close to you."

"I get that. I don't like it, but I get it."

She sighs. "I'll try to get better at that."

"Well, thank you," I joke.

"You're welcome," she laughs. I can't help but smile at the sound. "Alright, last question. Make it a good one."

"Well, there is something that I want to know about last year."

I hear her go completely still and know that I've probably stepped over the line again. "Nevermind. I can think of another question." I say quickly.

"No. No. You're going to have to find out sooner or later. Might as well talk about it. You want to know where I went during the fall of last year."

"Yeah," I say, hesitantly. "You just kind of disappeared for a while and when you came back, you were...different."

"Yeah," she breathes out.

"Are you sure you want to talk about this? You sound really upset."

"Yes." I can hear her mentally preparing herself. "Yes, I do."

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Ryan

This is it. This is what I've talked with Lisa about for months. I'm ready. I am about to tell someone other than my family and my three best friends. I can do it. I've gotta do it if anything is going to happen between Carter and me. I steel myself and start.

"Ok, you remember the guy that I was dating when I exploded at Patrick?" I say.

"Yeah, that Tommy kid, right?" Carter says.

"Yeah, Tommy Jones." I exhale and forge ahead. "So Tommy and I had dated for a while, about four months, actually. I thought that we were in love. So, things had been advancing...physically, but I wasn't quite ready for sex. I was a virgin and I...just wasn't ready."

"I mean, who doesn't feel that their first time?"

"Well, Tommy didn't."

"What do you mean?" Carter's voice hardens.

"He had been wanting to have sex since we first got together. He'd pushed me to do...things that I wasn't ready for, but I had held off having sex. But, that changed the night of the party on the last day of freshman year..."

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Author's Note:

Thank you for reading Dissonance and Harmony!  I received an exclusive contract for this book and had to take down the rest of the story.  You can find the completed story on the GoodNovel app.