Orange Crush

Chapter 34

It was morning, the day of the raid. Yuri was apprehensive, Ju-Sheng had jelly legs, and Ddaeng took more than one shot of vodka. Yuri looked up at the ceiling, hoping today would go better than she thought, that nobody got hurt, and that everybody survived. She hoped that Aari would come home unscathed, and could marry her. Aari's love for her was unmatched, they had loved each other a long time. Yuri loved Aari since they were 12, but began hating him in high school. For his 14th birthday, she had written him a song, but never got up the chance to play it for him.

"Is everybody ready to train again?" Ju-Sheng asked.

"Yeah, I'm ready." Ddaeng said. Ju-Sheng paused.

"You're here. Why?" Ju-Sheng asked Ddaeng.

"Why not?" He replied with a grin.

"You are not welcome here. I made that clear a few years ago." Ju-Sheng said. Yuri grimaced. Unfortunately, Ju-Sheng and Ddaeng both noticed her expression. Ddaeng winked.

"You want him to stay?!" Ju-Sheng screamed.

"Bitch did I fucking say that?! You really want to start shit with me at 7 in the morning?!" Yuri yelled back at him.

"He's staying." She said, gesturing to Ddaeng. Ju-Sheng was speechless. So many things ran through his head.

"I guess you have a thing for rapists." He said snidely. Yuri turned around, and walked back towards Ju-Sheng.

"I don't think you'd want to go back to the base with a black eye and broken nose, would you?" Yuri threatened.

"No thanks." Ju said, looking away from her dark gaze. Ddaeng studied Yuri, looking into her eyes, seeing her soul. Ddaeng was confused.

"I second whatever she said." Ddaeng smiled. Yuri looked at him, and then rolled her eyes.

'I don't understand what's wrong with her.' Ju-Sheng thought. She had a huge heart, she could forgive anyone. She even forgave Ddaeng for what he did to her. Ddaeng has molested her countless times, yet she forgave him. He got her pregnant, yet she forgave him. She was too forgiving, he thought.

'What is it with her and forgiving people? She forgave Aari, and now she forgave Ddaeng?' He thought again. Ju-Sheng couldn't control his intrusive thoughts.

'Her big heart could get her in trouble.' He thought. Ddaeng coughed.

"Does this mean I get to tag along?" He said in a mock British accent.

"Down, boy. I am not trusting you with a gun." Yuri said sternly. Ddaeng looked rejected.

"I don't blame you.." He whispered to himself, looking at Ju-Sheng, who stared him right in the eye. Yuri left with her friends, looking to collect the other people who joined her militia.

"If you fucking think for even a second, that you can do what you did to Yuri again, you'll be sorry you ever crossed paths again." Ju-Sheng threatened Ddaeng. Ddaeng recoiled in fake terror.

"I'd fuck you too, but that'd be incest. If you weren't my cousin, I'd hit that." He said, checking out Ju-Sheng jokingly.

"Would you stop that?! You are not 9! Stop being so immature!"

"I can't take anything seriously anymore, what would you expect from me? I'm Ddaeng for fucks sake! My name means 'wrong' in Korean! I am wrong! My whole damn mindset is wrong! God, and I'd expect you of all people to understand! You knew about that kid! You told him about Damon! You're the damn reason Satoro killed himself! He couldn't handle you! You're the reason Satoro is dead! You want to fucking threaten me?! Tell that to Satoro. I'll meet you in hell, brother." Ddaeng walked out the door, leaving Ju-Sheng alone in his apartment. Ju-Sheng was wrong. Ddaeng was right. Ddaeng meant 'wrong', but he was right. Ju-Sheng finally pulled himself out of his feelings, and got up the nerve to go to the base.

Everything is a blur. I don't even remember Yuri telling me that story about her grandpa taking her to the base as a kid. I don't even remember Hiroto getting 6 headshots in a row. I don't even remember loading my own gun. All I remember is Ddaeng. The things he told me. He was right. I hated when he was right, even when we were children. Kyushi and him were the best of friends. They got along so well, I didn't fit in. I used to talk to Satoro. Satoro was my rock. He killed himself because of me. Ddaeng was right. Dari even knew it. Dari was Satoro's best friend, the best cousin ever. I got jealous. Ru just sat there. Ru was dark. But through Satoro's laugh, I could see his darkness. All of us had darkness inside us. Nobody had it worse than Satoro and Ddaeng. Dari used to tell me things about Satoro, things Satoro said to him about me. Satoro loved me, but I loved him more, and that hurt him. He didn't like being loved. He's gone because of me. Me, Ju-Sheng Dietsu, the reason Satoro is dead. It's 3:00pm. We have 4 hours until the raid. The weather forecast calls for sunshine around that time. I guess the sun can smile when others don't. I guess it means something. Something I don't understand. Something nobody understands. Leave it up to the world to do something not understandable. Just my luck.