My Heart Is Yours

Mistakes (pt. 6)

I'm a few feet from the car and I hear Louis calling after me "Valerie! Val! Wait. Wait for me!!" I just keep walking. There was no way in hell, I was stopping. Im right at the car when a hand grabs my arm, they turn me around, and before I can even gather my thoughts I'm pressed up against the car door. He hand stroking the side of my face and the other around my waist pulling me into him. We kiss for a minute and I pull away. "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING, I have a boyfriend!" I scream in his face, turning around and opening the car door. His hand slams the door closed.

"Wait.....please, that was a mistake." he says, sounding incredibly sensitive. I don't make a move and just stare at the ground. I look up at him. Giving him permission to continue. "I am so sorry... I really didn't want to mess anything up with your boyfriend. I just....I really like you and...." he stops to look around at his surroundings, I can tell that he's trying to hold back the tears. I nod and get in the car.

Everyone else comes up the beach, and hops into the car. We drive and it's silent between Louis and I. Everyone's chatting in the back, I rest my arm on the side of the car door and just stare out the window, just watching the scenery go by quickly.

After about 5 minute of dead silence, I feel a warm hand on my knee. I glace at Louis trying to not make it obvious that I was interested in anything he was doing. He began to rub my knee with his thumb. "Val... please talk to me." I don't reply for a minute but after thinking, I say, "Its fine Louis. Lets just forget about it." I move my knee and shake his hand off of it. He slowly took his hand back and I could see the hurt in his eyes. Niether of us, spoke again the rest of the car ride back to my house.

When the car finally comes to a stop, I quickly get out of the car and slam the door shut. I made  my way to the porch and whispered "Shit..." When I realized Tori had the key. "Just great." I mumble to myself as Louis came up the walk way and up the steps to the porch. I look away  but he quietly says "I am so sorry, I hope we can still be friends... if that's ok?" Ugh, who the hell does he think he is. "Sure." I say and flash him a noticeably fake smile. He grins slightly, but I can tell he's disapointed by the look in his eyes. He calmly backs away and gives me a shy wave. Which was so unlike him...

I suddenly remember the spare key under the doormat. I lift it up, unlock the door and shut it gently. A tear escapes from my now closed eyes. I lean against cold door for support and gradually slid down it. Hugging my knees, I think "What have I done."