Amnesia

Chapter 3

-Eddie POV-

Richie stood up and grabbed another cigarette. I decided to follow him, just to see what he does when I'm not around.

He walked over to his desk. He picked something up. Tears continued to roll down his cheeks. He glanced at what ever he picked up and began crying harder.

I looked over his shoulder and noticed what it was. It was a picture of... Me.

Why the hell would he have a picture of me? That's a bit creepy. Whatever the reason was, it seemed to make him cry harder.

It was because he missed me. I knew it right away. I don't know how long I've been out, but it must be pretty long for him to be crying and smoking this much.

"Richie... " I let a tear fall down my cheek and onto his hand.

"Eddie?" Richie turned around and looked at me.

"R-Richie?" I stammered. "You can see me?"

I can feel myself disappearing. Almost evaporating.

"Richie!" I call out to him. He doesn't say anything. He turns around and looks at me.

I know it's just a dream, but it feels so real. It's like when my mom would make me take all that placebo medicine. I knew it was fake, but my mother kept convincing me it was real. I kept taking it for years, and even though I know it's fake now, it still hurts to know someone who was supposed to love me, hurt me that bad.

-RICHIE POV-

I get up from by bed to get another cigarette. I miss Eddie so godamn much. Why the fuck did this have to happen? Why did I fuck it up?

I exhale the smoke from my mouth. That gives to the memory of when I would jokingly blow cigarette smoke into Eddie's face. He would yell at me in his cute little voice, and I would have to cup my hands around his face to get him to calm down. He looked so happy when I would hold him like that.

If only I could still hold him like that...

I would do nothing more than hold his beautiful baby face, with his large brown eyes, toy with his beautiful and adorable chocolate curls for hair. To nuzzle his cute, freckled, blushing cheeks, to wrap my hands around them, and kiss his pink glossy lips. To tell him a love him, over and over and over again. That I would kill that fucking crackhead clown for a second time so It wouldn't hurt him.

I love him so much. Now I may never get the chance to tell him.

"Eddie." I whispered. "Why...?" I pick up some picture of him. Why can't he be here with me? Why couldn't it had been me?

It's not just any picture though. It's a picture of us. The Losers Club. It was at the Derry Fair. We were all sitting down together. Ben and Beverly were making the peace sign. Bill and Stan were smiling at the camera. You could barely notice, but they were holding hands. Mike was putting up bunny ears behind Bill. Eds was holding a stuffed bunny that was almost as large as him. Meanwhile, if you look close enough, you can see me looking at Eddie.

God dammit, why do I have to have such a huge fucking crush on him? Why can't I like a girl like Ben does? Why do I have to like boys?
Maybe it's because that I've never liked girls. Maybe because Eddie is in his tiny red shorts all the time.

I lit another cigarette and walked over to my desk. The picture of Eddie still implanted in my brain. I lean over the desk and cry. Harder than I ever have before.

That's when I feel it.

A small teardrop lands on my hand.

"Eddie...? " I whisper.

If I'm not crazy, than why is Eddie Kaspbrak holding my shoulder and crying? I watch speechless, as he fades, almost like he was a forgotten memory that came back to haunt me like a ghost hidden in the walls of its home.

I sit upright with a start. I'm covered in tears and sweat.

"It's just a dream, Richie. You were just dreaming... "

At least I thought it was. I can't see anything. Only black. Nothing else.

"Richie..." A voice echoes

"What the fuck...?" I look around.

"It's me, It's Eddie!" The voice exclaims.

As much as I hate to admit it, it is him. I can hear his high pitched voice, sprinkled with a bit of deep maturity, almost like an autumn-filled air, with leaves falling from trees, but with the dark overrun of dark shadows and snow, coming from the north winters, charging in like soldiers.

"It's okay!" The voice soothes. "I'll be with you when it's your time, Richie. Then we'll be together."

Red balloons.

That's all I can see now. They're surrounding me, suffocating me.

I wake up in my bed at about 2:00 am. I'm crying and barely breathing. The reason I wake up is because the phone is ringing. I pick it up to hear two words.

He's awake.