Words & Whiskey

EDITED VERSION: Chapter Fourteen

It was the next night and I hadn't seen Nathan all day. Alex left for her train around eight in the morning and Darian decided to go to his parent's place for the night seeing as he hadn't visited them all semester despite living in the same city. I didn't really have anything planned for the night, so I shot Samara a text message asking if she wanted to go out, but as luck would have it, she was busy. I sat on the edge of my bed, dressed up, with nowhere to go. Sighing, I decided to take off my outfit and replace them with my pink flannel pyjamas. I padded my way to the living room and made myself comfortable on the couch, turning on the television. I searched through the Netflix selection until I settled on watching some documentary on oceans.

Clearly, the documentary wasn't as riveting as I thought it would be, because I fell asleep as quickly as it started. However, I jolted awake when I heard the door swing open, followed by a slam, and panting. I rubbed my eyes lazily, not too concerned as I was thinking it was likely just Nathan coming home from work, tired from his shift. But when my vision adjusted in the dark, aside from the light of the television, I saw Nathan roaming his hands all over the body of the girl who was pressed against the door. They began to kiss, or rather, attack one another's faces until the girl flipped the two and now Nathan was against the door. The girl kissed his mouth, his cheek down to his jaw, and then began sucking on his neck. Nathan's eyes landed on mine and I flinched, feeling awkward watching what was happening. But it was like a natural disaster, you want to look away, want to forget about it, but for whatever reason, you keep staring. Looking away, I quietly got up and began walking to my room, careful not to startle the girl who was all over him - although she was so caught in the moment, I don't think she would have noticed regardless of how much noise I made.

When I got to my room, I shut my door quietly, leaning my back against it as I sunk down. For whatever reason, tears danced in my vision and eventually started to pour. I knew as soon as they started, they weren't going to stop, despite not knowing why they were happening in the first place. Maybe it was the fact that I missed my parents with it being so close to Christmas. Maybe it was because I was still upset with Alex for causing a scene, impacting not only my friendship with Jude but also Nathan. Or maybe... No. I shook the thought away; I wasn't going to say it. If I did, it would only make what I feel official and I didn't want to. I'd only be setting myself up for heartbreak.

Wiping my tears away, I walked over to my record player, carefully placing the needle on the vinyl. Jeff Buckley's album Grace began to play softly as I laid on my bed and I sighed. For the first time since I moved here, I missed home.

***

A knock on my bedroom door woke me from my sleep. Despite not answering, the door creaked open anyway. "Audrey, are you sleeping?"

Obviously I am if I didn't answer the door, I wanted to say but didn't. I sat up and peered into the darkness. "Darian?"

"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that," the voice replied, clearly belonging to Nathan. "Can I come in?"

I looked at my phone that was charging on my nightstand and clicked the button. It read three a.m. "Nate, it's three in the morning, what's going on?"

I saw him vaguely shrugged his shoulders. "Can't sleep."

"Alright," I said through a yawn as I patted the space beside me. "Come in. Not enjoying the company of that girl?"

"When you went to your room, I told her that I changed my mind," Nathan laid beside me, careful not to touch me and simply stared at the ceiling. "She went home."

"Oh," I respond stupidly, laying back down. I turned my head to face Nathan. "Why did you change your mind?"

Nathan thought to himself for a moment, seemingly scared to give me an honest answer. Eventually, he broke the silence. "She wasn't the one I wanted so it wasn't right."