Safe and Sound

Chapter 11

    Wade and I split a couple blocks from my place. Apparently he lives pretty close. May was drunk and awake when I got home, but stumbling. I kept my distance, but she wouldn’t stop advancing. I had a fifty percent chance, oh well.

    Her hits weren’t well coordinated, but when she started bawling about Uncle Ben, whose death date is coming up soon, she starts to throw things.

I don’t know how this woman does it but even drunk her aim is amazing. It’s kind of impressive actually. But it also sucks when you're the target of a beer bottle and dirty plate she left on the in-table.

I limp back to my room. I have eaten a bit these last few days, but not enough to heal anything major. Some of my bruises are fading, and I’m not quite so tired, but it’s still not enough to do anything else, especially with my metabolism… So I lock my door, change into my suit, and leap out my window, still aching.

I swing over a few buildings and settle onto the rooftop, texting Ned and MJ, I explain all about Wade.

MJ- So he knows? Like, he’s cool with it?

Ned- That’s so cool! Three people make a club! Spider Club! You should see if Ms. Romanoff wants to join.

Peter- I don’t think so Ned. I barely know them.

MJ- I don’t know Peter, it sounds like they really like you. Be careful! They may ask you to move in! :}

Peter- Can I add Wade to the chat?

MJ- Sure

Ned- Totally!

                -Peter has added Wade to the group-

    Wade- Peter what is this? Who are these other guys?

    Peter- Wade these are my friends Ned and MJ. They also know I’m Spider-man, and wanted to say hi.

    MJ- Sup! You hurt him, you die. No ands, ifs, or buts.

    Wade- Sounds about right.

    Ned- Sooooooooo

    Ned- What are you guys doing?

    Ned- I’m bored.

    Ned- I’m not doing anything.

    MJ- Don’t spam.

    MJ- Homework.

    Wade- Watching Peter.

        Peter is typing…..

        Peter is typing…..

    Peter- Wade wtf are you doing? This is not the time to

    MJ- Peter?

    Ned- Peter? What happened?

    MJ- Wade I swear to god I will END YOU

    MJ- I WILL KILL U IF U HURT HIM

    MJ- I WILL SELL YOUR KIDNEYS ON THE BLACK MARKET

    Ned- Same. I call dibs on the kneecaps!

    Wade- Calm down, I didn’t hurt Peter. He’s being chased around by the Avengers at the moment though, so we’ll get back to you.

    Wade- I’m DeadPool, by the way. Gonna try and slow down Cap, the weirdo is trying to do some weird spinny shit ttyl.

    MJ- Not again!

    Ned- Peter let us know if you're okay when you're done, we don’t want a repeat of last time.

    Wade- What happened last time?

    MJ- The idiot got himself shot with an arrow. I think last night was the third time Hawkeye shot him.

    Wade- So this has been happening for a while?

    Ned- They’ve been trying to catch him for the last three months. He’s still got scars on his back from Iron Man’s blasters.

    Wade- Why hasn’t he told them yet?!

    Peter- Because if I do they’ll make me sign some stupid contract, reject me, shut me down or some other stupid thing. Being Spider-man lets me help me, I can’t let them take that.

Peter- Besides, it started before I knew them and now they know who I am and I know them and it would be weird and knowing them they would feel bad for stabbing me.

Wade- STABBING YOU?

Peter- Yeah, I think it was an accident though.

MJ- Peter are you okay?

Ned- So this is dramatic.

MJ- Peter?

Peter- Not really.

Peter- Wade I’m on the South side of Central Park.

Peter- I need your help.

Peter- I think Nat dislocated my shoulder when she threw me off the roof.

MJ- Damnit Peter.