Raphael's Heart (2nd book)

10

1/10/22
Raphael's POV

A week passed by like the wind and all I can remember is being in pain for the first three days, then basking in lingering soreness for the rest.

I asked Donnie to drug me up but the dick thought I'd get fucking addicted. Nothing new. I can't even find it in me to feel bad for myself. I'd expect myself to get addicted too.

This past week has been nothing but literal pain in my ass and general worry for (Y/n) because she hasn't come to visit me at all ( not that she has to). Christmas happens over the week and I guess the guys didn't have anything planned cause I laid in bed all day while while the guys went on with their regular routine.

I bet (Y/n) had fun with Jackson.

She has the audacity to call my brothers and ask them how I'm doing, though. She's even sent food for me to eat like she said she would, but that's it.

I honestly can't say that I'm not offended. While I know that I've been an asshole to (Y/n), I thought we were beginning to fix things.

It's hard to deal with the confusion of it all, and I know that a good beer would clear it all for me. The urge to drink stays persistent like a ghost haunting your house, especially in the past week. The soreness, the pain , and the whirl of emotions could all be washed down so easily with some Budweiser right now. But I can't.

I can't let my brothers and (Y/n) down.

"Hey, Raph!" Donnie greets as he comes into my room - slapping the door frame as he walks past it. He looks distracted as he looks around for something immediately walking in.

"If you're looking for the pain meds, I don't have them." I deadpan - making sure Donnie doesn't make any fucking assumptions.

Donnie turns to face me abruptly with a shocked expression on his face. "Oh, no, that's not why I'm here. I'm just making sure there weren't any security implants in here. Last time you encountered and fought our enemies, you were going berserk."

"What do you mean?" I ask - not that I fucking care.

"You weren't exactly on our side the last time you fought guys like S.I.L.V.E.R." He pauses as if he's waiting for me to get his point. "Remember: Shredder and his associates? They implanted something in you and you kept trying to hurt us... never mind."

Of course, that's what he thinks of.  It's not like I didn't know what he was talking about. I just wanted to hear him say it.

"Shit, why didn't you guys just lock me up then?"

Donnie faces me with a guilty, exasperated look on his face. "Come on, Raph. It's not like that."

"Sure it isn't. Did (Y/n) stop by yet?" I ask as I attempt to sit up. Despite the aches and certain places of throbbing, it doesn't take much effort out of me.

Once I'm upright I clutch onto the side of the bed to take a breath and situate myself after a flash moment of vertigo.

"Careful!" Donnie scolds as he rushes towards me.

He moves his hand to touch my forehead, but I bat it away before he can do anything. I don't need his fucking pity right now; I've had enough of it for the past week.