Vice (H.S)

CHAPTER 3 - LIPSTICK

"Elwin Banks! Tell me exactly what I just walked in on."

I pace the pink tiled floor, coaching my heart rate to slow. It's no use. I'm burning up. Walking to the sinks, I crank the cold water, letting the icy stream cool my palms, my wrists. But I don't dare look up from the faucet to the wall of mirrors; I can't bear to look myself in the eye right now.

"Winnie, look at me." Peggy's voice jars me and I turn towards her. Seeing my panicked face, she changes her tone.

"He didn't..." she falters. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

Hidden away, smeared lipstick and messy hair. I imagine how it might've looked and quickly shake my head. "No, of course not."

Her smile immediately returns as she joins me, leaning against the sink counter.

"Then what's your excuse? How'd you end up tangled in the drapes with Harry Styles?"

Harry.

That's his name.

Harry.

I repeat it in my head endlessly.

A snap of fingers between my eyes breaks my trance and Peggy stares at me impatiently. "Winnie."

"I don't know," I sigh. "He was there, and then... It just happened."

She seems unconvinced, and I watch the calculated look cross her soft, pixie-like features. "That's not like you, Win."

"Believe me. I know." I feel a headache coming on.

"So, what now?"

"What now? Nothing now," I let out forcefully. "You didn't see anything, okay? And you will swear to secrecy for the rest of your life, Peggy Wallace, if you know what's good for you."

"Alright, alright. But your lipstick is damning evidence." Pulling a handkerchief from her small purse, she leans towards me to dab lightly around my mouth.

"You're so quiet. It's freaking me out. What's on your mind?"

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It's taking everything in me to steer clear of where I was just moments ago; who I was with, what I was doing just moments ago. It was a dream, wasn't it? It must have been.

"Was the kissing nice?" Peggy's inquisition shatters my inner monologue.

I avoid her stare, choosing instead to study the powder room wallpaper: orangutans peeking between fronds of jungle foliage.

"Please tell me you've been kissed before..."

"I'm 25 years old, Peggy." I huff at the ridiculous notion, breaking my contemplative silence.

"Just checking! I don't think I've ever heard of any kisses." She's baiting me. I give her a colorful look and sigh in defiance.

"Yes, I've been kissed. I went to summer camp and school dances. I've had many, many mediocre kisses in my lifetime. None of them were worthy of talking about." And none of them measure up to what I just experienced behind that curtain. Not even close.

Satisfied with her lipstick clean-up job, she hands me the small gold tube to touch up my color.

"And this kiss... this kiss was just another mediocre one? The movie star kisses poorly?"

"No." I tilt my head back, leaning against the cool wall, shutting my eyes tightly to sever the memory.

"He kisses really poorly?"

I shake my head. "What? What is it?"

"You will not repeat this." I give her a stern look and she nods obediently.

"Fine, I won't repeat it," she offers innocently.

"He was... perfect." Peggy looks at me expectantly, waiting for me to continue. When I don't, she pushes on.

"Perfect, huh? Where did he put his hands?" She nudges me with her skinny elbow and I frown, rolling my eyes.

"At my waist, where else?"

"There are more interesting places, Winnie."

"You are trouble, Peggy Wallace. You know that? How do your parents let you out of the house?" She shrugs dismissively.

"So, he was perfect?"

I nod.

"That kiss... it can't possibly get better than that."

She chuckles in response. "So... he was good, huh?"

It doesn't matter if it was good. It doesn't matter if it was unexpected and felt like I was soaring. If I'm allowed one moment of recklessness every quarter of a century, then that was mine.

I will live off the memory of this evening forever. The way he held me, gentle and desperate and sweet. The way his mouth found mine with ease. The way I felt his pulse beneath my fingertips and the way the beat of his heart synced with mine immediately.

I can put away the awoken feelings of tonight. I can lock them up and cast them aside and marry the man my parents have chosen for me. I can. Because that's what everyone does, right?

I do not answer Peggy. I do not confirm what she knows is true.

He was good.

And if life is fair, then I won't have to dwell too long on how that makes my heart ache. I won't have to spend the next 25 years of my life trying to forget him.

Peggy follows me as I numbly shuffle out of the bathroom, leaving behind my misdeeds, finding my seat once more in my father's box. I can almost pretend it never happened. I can almost pretend I got lost on the way to the restroom. It's a good thing Peggy came to fetch me, it's a good thing she stepped in before something regrettable happened. Something that couldn't be undone.

This time, I keep my eyes glued to the screen for the remainder of the film. And although I never turn my head to look, I feel a pair of green eyes watching me all the while.

*

*

*

*

*

Thank you to everyone who has been reading Vice so far! Your votes and comments mean everything to me. I can't wait for you to see where the story is headed! My update schedule is Monday, Wednesday, and Friday but sometimes I'll just upload a chapter here and there for fun.