Not Perfect

Chapter 6

I didn’t go far. I stayed on the steps of my high school rethinking any and every life choice I ever made. Searching through my personal history to know what caused my bulimia and how I could stop it. Any one could say it was being tormented about my weight, my absent father and the only male figure in my life feels it’s acceptable to leave his family behind without even a note. I had no control in my life; this was the only way to gain any. I wanted to stop, I had to stop.

Sasha interrupted my thoughts; she pushed through the large double doors and sat next to me on the steps. We sat in silence, a comforting silence filled with understanding. I knew Sasha cared for me; I never knew how much this disorder of mine affected her. I had no words to describe my rambling thoughts so I just laid my hand atop hers. She looked up at me, a sad smile crossed her lips, her tear stained cheeks got to me and a new layer of tears dropped from my eyes.

I wondered what we looked like, sitting on the steps of our school crying and holding hands. I wonder why no one came for us. I then realized no funny the situation was, my best friend and I skipping school but not even having the courage to go any further. I laughed, low and to myself at first but then growing into a fit of giggles. Sasha stared at me with a look of utter confusion which made me start all over again.

I didn’t know what I was doing with my life, but here I am laughing with my best friend.

Laughing, laughing, laughing. . . .