Lothario's Grand Thrill

Lothario Fade introduced the girl to the ride confident she'd be amused and beguiled with his sanguine sway. As they dallied in line the dazzle of lights and whir of contraptions awakened his joy and roused reckless pulse within, he leaned close to her, inhaling the feint aroma of her perfume, a whiff of lavender and hint of medicinal spirits, potent and intoxicating. He slipped his dark hand around her naked waist, his thick fingers dawdling on the band of her polka dot pedal pushers while he eyed the contours of her tank top and pressed his lips to her ear, whispering.

"You'll feel like you've never felt," said Lothario. "Anticipate it – a grand thrill."

She jabbed a sharp elbow into his ribs and said, "Will this line move any faster?"

"We'll be there, momentarily, assuredly," he said, appreciating her impatience, aroused by her attitude. "Look, they strap you in a cage; the line's moving."

"It's like forever."

"Well then, savor it like it is forever. Imagine us in the cage at the top, spinning crazy, swiveling insane."

"And then you come down, it doesn't last," she said. "What fun."

"Listen, it'll be a thrill, forget sarcasm, be assured, it swivels around and spins upside-down. Look. We're next."

Once strapped into the cage spinning at the apex of the colossal wheel, the thrill made the girl exhale in a way Lothario deemed delectable as the cage swiveled around and spun upside-down.

Lothario clenched his jaw and braced his palm against the teeter-totter of the metal cage, secured by the nylon belt strapped around his gut, suspended in a quixotic seesaw above the festival as lightning outlined billowing cumulus on a distant horizon, he whooped a wild, joyous cry.

The cage returned to earth and the operator said, "Alright folks, time to disembark."

"We want to go again," said the girl. "That was only half the ride; what'd we pay for a partial ride? Half price tickets?"

"That's the ride," the operator said. "It's over."

"We've been standing in line watching," she said. "Everybody else got to go around twice. We only went one rotation. Why must we disembark?"

"Everybody goes once, nobody goes twice," said the operator, who began to fidget, his gnarled fingers dabbing his bald pate, his dirty boot pivoting on a cigarette butt crushed on the platform. "No exceptions."

"What are you trying to pull?" said Lothario. "We went once, everybody else twice, that's crap; I don't like it, I don't like it at all."

"I don't like your attitude. I'm sick of cowboys like you," said the operator.

"Cowboys like me? There's nobody like me. You must be mistaken. Cowboy? Where'd that come from? My great grandfather just rolled over in his grave, just now, this very moment, and it's your fault with this cowboy talk."

"Don't disobey. Do as I say. Get off the ride or I'm calling the cops."

"Call away."

The operator called for muscle and attracted an anxious security guard who struggled with his belt and trousers as he fumbled over and escorted the girl out of the cage.

"Who the hell are you supposed to be?" said Lothario still in the cage. "Hey pops, why don't you go pound popcorn up your ass? Stick some cotton candy in your ear."

Security signaled a cop.

A sullen cop arrived and asked to see identification. Lothario suspected the cop could see nothing from the dark prescription glasses covering the hollow sockets between his gaunt cheeks and pale forehead.