INFERNO HEARTS •lydia martin

11. || man down

Turns out Scott and I had the same dream, well with different people, and different places but they are extremely similar. Now, we're walking into school trying to explain to Stiles exactly what happened in our dreams last night.

"So, you killed them?" Stiles asks confused as to what the twins are implying.

"I think so, in mine it was awful her face was so pale and there was so much blood just pouring from her mouth and stomach. It was horrifying and felt way too real" I say feeling the shiver go down my spine, Stiles looks at me slightly shocked he's never seen me this freaked out before.

"That's where mine is different, I don't know. I just woke up. I was sweating like crazy, and I couldn't breathe. I've never had a dream where I woke up like that before" Scott explains looking equally as freaked out.

"Really? I have. Usually ends a little differently" Stiles says causing me to glare at him as I feel my breakfast coming back up.

"Way too much information. Like, this is why you are a virgin" I say with a disgusted look on my face whilst motioning to him, just him. He looks offended but before he can stick up for himself Scott's cutting in.

"A, I meant I've never had a dream that felt that real, and B, never give me that much detail about you in bed again" Scott says agreeing with his twin.

"Noted. Let me take a guess here though" Stiles says causing Scott to interrupt him again.

"No, I know. You think it has something to do with me going out with Allison tomorrow. Like I'm gonna lose control and rip her throat out" Scott says glaring at Stiles, I already know what he's going to say about my dream.

"And for me you're going to say it has something to do with hidden feelings, I don't have feelings for her! I never have and never will. The dream it's just... complicated" I say trying to find the right words to use.

"No, of course not" Stiles starts but Scott and I give him the look. "Yeah, that's totally it. Hey, come on. It's gonna be fine, all right! Personally, I think you two are handling this pretty freaking amazingly. You know, it's not like there a lycanthropy for beginners class you can take."

"Yeah, not a class, but maybe a teacher" Scott says looking at Stiles and I with hinting eyes.

"Oh, so now you want his help, typical" I say rolling my eyes, of course he wants Derek now that he needs answers.

"Who, Derek?" Stiles says slapping Scott's head. "You forgetting the part where we got him tossed in jail?"

"Yeah, I know, but chasing her, dragging her to the back of the bus, it felt so real" Scott says and that I can agree with.

"And it was like I could feel the blood oozing out of her stomach, it was horrifying, and it felt so real to the point where I almost threw up this morning" I explain shivering from the memory.

"How real?" Stiles asks curious to know what is running through the dark-haired twins mind, he is never 100% sure he will ever work out my thought process.

"Like it actually happened" Scott and I say at the same time but, Stiles doesn't make a comment on us talking at the same time. No, we are all stood there staring our mouths agape as we take in the scene in front of us frozen still.

Fear is natural and is there to keep you alive and happy, yet here it has been weaponised and fashioned into a cage, the bus, the dream, and this whole incident is my cage. The saying goes 'one is honour bound to break free' I don't think I'm going to be able to, not unless Lydia is alive.

I try masking my fear from both boys, but it doesn't take a werewolf nose, or supernatural hearing to be able to tell that I am petrified. I can hear my own head thumping in my ears, so ridiculously loud.

A panic attack is a serious mental health event, and one you should seek professional counsel for. Stiles, Stiles suffered from them and even though I helped him through it I could never truly appreciate or understand how difficult it was for him, until now.

There are things I used to do to help Stiles lessen his stress and become healthier as he didn't want to go to therapy. But how the hell do you stop a panic attack from happening because your scared that you killed someone you cared about.

Guilt, I feel immense guilt fill my stomach and I can feel the bile building up in the back of my throat. I feel sick to my stomach, not with illness but with guilt.

The whole scene is traumatising and there are officers everywhere, sheriff Stilinski is talking to some women... maybe a witness. The bus is covered head to toe in blood surrounded by photographers taken pictures, deputy's getting DNA samples.

The smell of coppery blood is pungent in my nose, in fact it is so strong it causes me to flinch away from it. I go to speak but no words come out of my mouth, I probably look stupid like a fish out of water, well that's certainly how I feel.

"I think it did" Stiles says, of course he's the one who breaks the silence, and as those words hit it feels like I've been thrown into a reality I don't want to be a part of. Like I'm being thrown in the deep end of the pool without learning how to swim. I'm in way over my head and I feel sick, I'm scared, and I don't know what to do.

"No, no, no" is all I manage to say no intelligent speech, or anything that could help remotely. My body is full of denial, I back away wanting to hide and cower in the corner but instead of going anywhere I hit Stiles' chest.

I feel his arms wrap around me, almost as if it was instinct to him, I want to fight kick scream tell him not to get to close but I don't. I just let out a gasping sound almost a sob.

"What have we done?"

(A/N - I know this chapter is short but I wanted to update again, I hope you enjoyed and if you did, please vote, thank you ~ Hazza)