Inside Her Soul

3

Ivy's POV:

Silence was a piece of music I found my self drowning in a lot of the time.

But today it just seemed to hit me deeper than ever. It wasn't soothing at all and it didn't even have me pondering in my own world where all my opposing thoughts were nonexistent.

Instead it had me feeling empty.

I didn't know what the term could mean but I found out myself when I realised what I was feeling wasn't a sense of tranquil, how everyone called it.

It was a dangerous emotion you wouldn't know how bad the consequences would be, until it were too late.

And I had a huge gut feeling I'd be learning the outcomes soon enough.

Sleep never came to me last night. It was hard enough snoozing off to plain silence already but something just seemed to set me off. It was as if I were being restricted from having a moment of peace to myself. A punishment.

For the temper that got the best of me merely ten hours ago.

Death was a sensitive subject for us. And I went ahead and opened my mouth and dug us deeper in a hole we were just about getting out of. I brought back horrid memories none of us wanted to vision ever again. And the guilt in me was rising up every minute.

Hours must have passed since I'd been out on the patio, staring at the bundle of colours littered across the sky. There was no doubt my brothers would be awake and if so then they must have been avoiding me.

But what hurt the most was the fact none of them came to check on me. Theo, precisely.

Out of all three of them, he'd been the one to remind me to check my sugar levels and make sure I was taking the right dosage of medicine. In fact all of my brothers would put the word in but Theo had taken over as the lead role. Even if he wasn't home but away in another city, he would drop a text and a call straight after. But my phone remained silent the whole night.

I really must have crossed the line to the point where I wasn't a concern anymore.

My back had been to the patio doors so I never payed attention to the presence that was luring behind me, staring at the back of my head. He knew I could tell I wasn't alone and I knew he was waiting for me to turn around.

Yet I couldn't find the courage to do so. I was in the wrong, I made them all upset. Reese was bound to find out and if he didn't then that would be a huge miracle itself.

I was willingly being a coward and allowed myself to mask in the shadow it was casting me in.

• • •

"You okay?" I froze as I continued to stare out at the sky, the colours blending into a beautiful picture that seemed to lighten up everyone's lives but mine.

I couldn't do anything but give the shake of my head as my arms came to hug my body as I felt a shiver run down my spine. It wasn't from feeling a chill from the blazing hot weather but the intense change of gratitude.

Footsteps lightly treaded my way before they came to a stop. A hand wounded it's way through my hair, instantly creating a rhythmic pattern. My eyes fluttered shut at the soothing gesture, my mind allowing me to rest the weight I picked up upon all these years. But it didn't last long as I came back to reality and flinched forward, Reese's hand dropping from my head.

"Are you not...mad at me?" I questioned, bewildered by the sudden affection I was being showered upon.

Reese stared back at me in thought, his face impassive as always. What seemed like hours but really seconds passed by before he gave the slightest shake of his head before taking a step aside, heading towards one of the chairs that situated to our right.