Bubblegum Serenade

Different Feelings

It was summer vacation. The moon hang low.
Same shit but less shit, Eevee thought.
She missed the thrill of university, the sweating over being late from class because you were shoving sandwiches that didn't even taste good but hey, it cost a lot of cash so might as well make your body engine fuss over it. She missed her friends but she didn't allow herself to form that thought. Friends. What a strange word that made her blush—her body betraying the thoughts she so carefully hid.
Home managed to remain the same, she didn't expect coming back would be like a scene from a movie where the main character comes back from war, where everything surrounding the home was in ruins, but somehow the house remains intact and therefore the memory still persists. No, she hadn't expected anything because she was surprisingly having a good time, despite the frequent panic attacks that only appeared before bedtime, she was... stable. To say the least.
Her phone was shoved against her pocket, which was too big that it got lost there, as she dragged the spoon and ate cereal.
The phone buzzed.
She sighed as she fished for it.
A message from Jeralt. It took her half a moment to realize a smile had spread across her face.
The smile vanished in a blink.
You up?
Her fingers fumbled across the keyboard, the tic-tic-tic noise the only sound in the kitchen.
Half-up. Everything okay?
Three dots appeared. Then disappeared. Reappeared.
Jeralt was definitely hiding something.
She said nothing.
There's no point in life where 'everything' is okay. What is everything anyway?
For a moment, she wished teleportation was a thing so she could slap some sense into him. Despite him making sense. Ugh.
Let me rephrase, are *you* okay?
Three dots. Immediate response.
I feel better now that I've pissed you off.  Thanks.
She replied, without even thinking about what she said.
OK, now I'm worried. What's going on?
The not-so-unfamiliar anxiety bit her stomach, and she felt its teeth gnash, and before wanting to be ripped apart this early, she took the easy route out. She clicked on the call button.
No answer.
She sighed.
The anxiety didn't go down.
Considering throwing her phone into the sink and living life without technology wasn't such a bad idea.
Then, her phone ringed, the familiar twinkle-fart ringtone playing.
A ringtone personalized specifically for Grandmaster Top Fart-er in the entire university; Jeralt the Fart-er.
The phone was set on speaker.
He must've heard the spoon against the plate because he said,  "What are you eating?"
"Cereal." She said, mouth full.
"Gee, Eevs. Ambiguous." He sighed.
Her toes curled. "Look, I—fine." Grabbing the cereal box from the drawer nearby. "It's honey and chocolate chip, happy?"
"What a weird ass combination, man."
"Oh look, the food manufacturer number is on the bottom of the box." She said, playfully.
She couldn't see him, but she sensed that he rolled his eyes.
"Har, har," He mocked.
"Are you okay? Seriously, just shoot, yes or no. It won't take a breath." Eevee was holding her breath.
"Yes." Jeralt replied.
She clutched the plate and drained the milk, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "Are you at Uni?"
"Where else would I be?" His voice was tense.
Not only was Jeralt practicing his internship in order to graduate, but he was also basically held hostage because the principal is persistent on not letting Jeralt graduate unless the missing artifact is found.
Which is still missing.
Yikes.
Eevee suddenly felt useless, sitting in the kitchen in her pajamas, leaving the plate unwashed, leaving her friend to fend for himself.
"Have you heard from Logan?" She decided to change the subject.
"He's dealing with his own shit. But he's fine, I just called him."
"I wish I could call him, but you know how I am with phone calls." Eevee would rather text her way through life than call someone and hold a conversation. It rattled her senses.
Jeralt made a 'hmmm' sound. "What about now?"
"What about it?"
"You're doing great, top-notch, give yourself a pat on the back."
"This is different." She said, exasperated.
Then realized how that statement could be misinterpreted.
"I—I mean you're different." Fuck, I just made it weirder.
"Old news, V." Jeralt sometimes called her V for no reason.
The silence stretched between them like a fucking yoga class. But it wasn't uncomfortable. It was a flexible sort of silence.
"I have a call. I'll hear from you later."
Eevee felt disappointed. "Su—"
The call ended.
Now the silence stretched like a rubber band, ready to snap at any moment.
Her heart thundered. It felt like it was raining in her mind. Voices swishing around, thoughts clinging like glue, and the ever-present feeling of dread.
She wanted to pray, but she had forgotten how, God felt as distant as a star—out of her reach and she didn't bother reaching out either. It was her loss, she knew.
She never felt like winning.
But making her friends smile—it felt like a prize. It is a badge of honor.
And she missed them so damn much.