The Tales of Arjun and Panchali

LONGING

A/N : Hello all! I am finally going to update the next series of "The Tales of Arjun and Panchali". This new series starts with Arjun's return from his twelve year long exile. So read on and let me know how you liked it. Any suggestions are welcome!

Panchali's POV :

Twelve years have passed since his loving gaze fell upon me. Our lives changed and so did our equation. I was no longer the possessive and passionate lover Arjun had left behind. I had transformed into a responsible mother, daughter-in-law and QUEEN. All these years my heart had ached in his separation. His thoughts didn't leave my mind even for a second. In my moments of solitude, I found myself longing for his electric touch, passionate gaze and most importantly our camaraderie. After he left for his exile, I dived deep into responsibilities with which came the responsibility of being a mother. Before I knew, I was pregnant with my first child. I used to write letters to him which included each and every detail of how my life at Khandavprasth was moving ahead. One fine day, I thought of sending it to them but before I could do that, I received a news which stripped me off my calm, collective persona. "Panchali, I have great news for you! Arjun has married Princess Ulupi and thus gained the support of their kingdom in our favour. They have a son named Iravan," said Arya Bheem.

I closed my eyes to stop the tears from falling but my body betrayed all my efforts of staying in control. I shook with fury and then there was no end to my tears. They kept brimming out of eyes uncontrollably. I wiped my face and steadied myself. Surely, such a behavior wasn't appropriate for a queen. What would my other husbands think who also had married other wives after me. At that time, I welcomed them with great enthusiasm then why this difference in behavior? Somewhere deep down I knew that he wasn't going to stay a celibate for all these years yet this shock was draining me out. Some days passed and I accepted the truth with a heavy heart. The responsibilities at my end only kept on increasing. Soon, I gave birth to Arya Bheem's child and was momentarily lost in joys of motherhood. However, in my darkest times, my thoughts travelled to Ulupi and Iravan. How does Iravan look? How does Princess Ulupi look who was successful in compelling the greatest archer to marry her? A bitter resentment would fill me up but then how could I blame some other woman when my own Arjun broke my trust. MY OWN ARJUN? I laughed at the irony. He was no longer mine.... No longer mine.

Then came the news of his marriage to Princess Chitrangada of Manipur and their son Babruvahana. I was told that he himself proposed her for marriage which shattered my heart into a thousand pieces. I only wondered how it was possible for my already broken heart to be broken again and again by the same man so mercilessly. But this time, I didn't take much time to recover. I consoled myself by saying that what's the point of crying over someone who was never yours entirely? Why was I harboring expectations from someone who had proved that it didn't matter to him if I married all his brothers? He never cared for our exclusive relationship so why would he bother to stay lonely all these years? "But what about those memories Krishnaa?", my heart quipped. I travelled back to those memories where I felt the thrill of my life. His gentle touch, his absolute faith in me brought a small smile on my face. Those were days when Savyasachin belonged to Yajnaseni only.

Years went by like seconds and the moment of being in his presence was approaching fast. The news of his marriage to Princess Subhadra, Sakha Govind's sister reached me. I was amused by this one as he had taken the trouble of abducting her. Did he have to stoop so low this time? This time not only did he break my trust yet again but also lost some respect and what shall I say about Govind? On his advice, he abducted her. After all blood precedes friendship... He is her brother. Why would Govind think about his sakhi? Suddenly a horrible gloom took over my body. Not only my love but also my best friend betrayed me. Was there anyone I could call my own? I felt lonely like never before. The only light in my life were my children who were growing up so fast. I feared that I might lose them too someday. I had completely surrendered myself to my duties of being a Queen. I performed my duties mechanically. No longer could I bear the hurt and betrayal. After his marriage to Ulupi, I told myself to stay strong and stop caring about him but the more he drifted apart, the more I longed for him.

However, today he is going to return to my life again but does he even need me anymore? The entire kingdom is decorated for his welcome but not me. I am not keeping well. I feel drained and lost. Subconsciously, I made my way towards the balcony where I spent my most days in memories, where I relived our sweet memories before The Last Goodbye. Little did I know, it'll be the same place of our first meeting after twelve long years...