Okay, this is a big one, and I have a lot of pent-up hatred for this complete dumpsterfuck of a pile of rotting shit.
Excuse my excessive usage of cussing as I go on the future presentation of RWBY: This Show Sucks Donkey Shit.
Where do I even begin? Oh yeah, how about the first episode? Forgive me, I haven't watched RWBY since 2017-18 (season four episode 3 had just come out) so my recollection of events in each 13-minute pile of shit is spotty.
Ahem.
Okay, so the ginger dude Spotsdick the clown, Roman the pimp, whatever, West Side strolls his fruity ass into a memed out joke of a name store and starts robbing the older and possibly Asian (like fucking really?) shopkeep who will henceforth become a more interesting, and integral character to the show than the titular Ruby Rose. Okay, fine, animation is trash, but with a budget of just enough to buy a bag of Cheetos, and possibly a handy from your sister, what did you expect?
Que obnoxious use of butt-metal, that will be used for the rest of the fucking show, and the introduction to the main reason I can't fucking stand RWBY: Ruby. Dumb ass one-liner, and stupid ass goon flies through window, and stupid ass, unnecessary fight ensues where I quickly realize this show will be eighty percent fighting and zero percent of plot development.
Roman uses a pimp cane to blow Ruby up, but she's unfazed due to being the Main Character™. Ruby chases the flamboyant douchebag and fucks up for the first time in the series. Not five fucking minutes into the show. Cue hot but uber retarded one-note villain Cinder Plot Device, and my personal favorite and unutilized character Glynda Milfwitch. Glynda shows that a huntress is formidable with some pretty dope purple effects. Cinder retaliates with an even cooler dope effect by throwing some weird glass shot at Glynda and The Girl. Cinder escapes, because plot.
Ruby is being grilled for being an idiot, but is an admittedly massive cunt move by Glynda. Ozpin the apparently morally grey comes to the rescue. The first episode is over and I was originally excited for more. When I was a fucking retard. End scene. I'm gonna review all these episodes, one at a time, and then. Then the rant shall be unleashed.
YOU ARE READING
I dont fucking know.
RandomJust a collection of dumb bullshit I want to rant about when I'm bored, or just stupid jokes I think are funny, but aren't really all that funny.
