i still love you | osaki shotaro

five

21.04.14

dear shotaro, 

i went to the park today. sadly, you weren't there. 

perhaps you're preparing for the robotic competition? i just hope you won't catch a cold in this raining season.

i bought a small cheap canvas at the bookstore down the alley as i wanted paint those cherry blossoms at the park here.

whenever i looked at those cherry blossoms on the branch, i felt like the fully bloomed cherry blossoms are celebrating and welcoming a brand-new start. every time i looked at those beautiful flowers, it always makes me smile and gives me good vibes. 

setting my imagination free and expressing my feelings on the canvas, i hold the brush as if my life is depending on it. every stroke brush dancing on its own creating a masterpiece as if they were performing on stage.

i remembered my art school teacher once told, the journey of color from the tube to the canvas is a battle against uncertainty, second-guessing, and compromise. first, you try to figure out what color you need. then you mix the paint on your palette until it matches your intention. you apply it to the canvas where you push and pull the colors around until it looks right. the more you work the paint the muddier it becomes. painting is maddening because the harder you work, the worse your painting looks. 

it makes you want to cut your ear off.

but to design something and deepen your understanding in arts is a very special moment where you feel satisficed with your masterpiece. care enough to notice and your enthusiasm for a single brush stroke can echo for decades in the minds of the people who become infected by your passion.

i paused for a moment and realized i've finished my painting. i was staring at the canvas, surprised that my mind was controlling me this whole time and drew one of my lovely memories.

 a man and a woman walking together, holding hands and walking in this cherry blossom path. and those people were my parents, their first date. ain't that lovely?

should we create our own date soon, shotaro?

...

i wrote this longer than usual, i was too immersed with the art thingy. don't forget to vote!