Notice Me

Chapter 4 - Step 3 'Investigation'

Elise above^

"I instanly smile when I see a text from you, I don't care what's in it, It's amzing to know I crossed your mind even for a second."

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I believe we all have two personality, our personality in real life. The person you are when your with your friends, you person you are with your family, the person you are when your alone and the person you are with the guy/girl you like. We could the good girl with your parents, getting straight A's, wearing conservative clothes, no skin showing and great manners, but with your friends you might be the 'bad girl', always swearing, wearing less clothes and drinking or hanging with guys. You could be two different people with your friends and family but that might not be who you really are. The person your really are is the person you are when your alone, listening to the music you want to listen to, wearing the clothes and makeup you want. Or you are the person you want to be when you're with the guy/girl you like, laughing and having fun, aslong as that person likes you for who you are then being yourself is the only thing you want to do.

Then you have the personaltiy on the internet. You might be someone who posts a lot of selfies because you feel the need to be noticed or liked by people. You need to be reminded that you look good or aren't too fat or chubby, you want to know that people think you're good looking. You might express your feelings though facebook or tweeter because you want people to care, to ask if you're okay, if you want to talk about it or just to have someone to talk to. Or you may just have all these social media apps because you like to know what's happened and what's going on in the world of teenagers and news.
You could think before acting over text and if you regret something that you've written you can easily delete it and rewrite it before the person reads it and you can easily delete the post or photo you posted on Facebook or Instagram before anyone sees it. But in life you don't have a delete or redo button, you can't get back what you said, once you've said it it's out there for everyone to hear. And once you've said it, it spreads all over, you say you like someone you suddenly find that everyone knows and they're asking you questions like:
"soooo... You and ____, hey?"
"so how's ____?"
"are you and ____ a thing?"
And after awhile you get really annoyed, so you do what every girl and guy does... You spend hours after hours on every social media app he/she has and you stalk them, you look at what they have like, posted, being tagged in or have even commented on. You try to found out what they like and what they do in there spare time or why they aren't answering your text or calls.

You try to find their number or where they hangout or what classes they have and where their locker is. You try and try to find these things but you never do find any of this out, so you go to your friends or to his friends and ask them to help you to talk to him/her or just to know a little about them. But it of your friends with them or yo've talked to them in class then yo can ask some of these questions or questions like what their hobbies are or what they like.

I call this, Step 3 'Investigation'.

In my case with Gabe, I had tech with him and in my class I didn't have any friends or anyone I could talk to, so I did the only thing left which was to talk the guys and one of them was Gabriel and he was really nice to me and included me in their conversations and I felt wanted. It's something we all want in life, to feel like we are wanted or needed or loved. It's something we can't deny or go without, I don't know if this is true for everyone but I know this is true for me and it's something that I would love to find someday... someone who will love me for me and doesn't care about my looks or if I'm skinny or fat, someone who will take care of me if I'm sick. It's something I've dreamt of since I was a little girl, dreaming of my prince charming who will sweep me off my feet and love me forever. I know that life isn't a fairytale and I know that there is no Prince Charming waiting to rescue me from a tower, I know that my life isn't some wattpad book where I met the love of my life in a coffee shop or he's the bad boy at school and I'm the good girl who changes his attitude, life isn't like that. Life isn't a Noah Sparks book or movie, life isn't planned out for us we have to make our own plans.

It was the end of last year when I decided to look him out, it was also when I decided to get Facebook, I didn't see the need to have it before then. He was one of the first people I looked up after my family and friends of course and after awhile it become a habit of mine to look him up at least once a week. I would normally look him up on the weekend just to found out what he was doing.
I started talking to him beginning of this year, our conversations started out really slow with him not replying for days or even weeks and me becoming jealous of anyone that talks to him. After we started talking a bit more and got to know each other better, I found out that he works and plays sport after school which was why he wasn't answering back to me. We talked for hours once but we never really answered straight way to one another, we 'played' 20 questions and we got to know each other heaps better. By the end of that I had a smile on my face whenever I heard his text tone, yep that's right, I have a certain text tone for him and I don't care what you guys think about me. We haven't talked for a while now it's been about a couple of weeks and I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!
But I'm getting a head of myself there is many stages before then...

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Hey Guys,
OMG I finally updated.... I'm sorry this one took me a while and it also deleted it's self when I had heaps written and I had to rewrite the whole thing.

vote,

comment,

follow.

love ya,
Chlo xx