Dear Future Husband...

Froyo

After school I meet up with Jessica and Rylee and we walk to the froyo place down the street. It isn't very crowded there, but they do have REALLY good frozen yogurt. I get my usual, cookies and cream froyo with recess pieces, mini m&m's, nutella, and strawberry bobas. Delicious. We sit down at a table and Jessica says,

"So, how are things going?" I hope it was directed towards Rylee, because I don't know what I would say to her. 'Good Jessica, because you don't know enough about my life already,' or something like that is what I probably would have said...

"Good," thank God he answered, "I hate the big science project that's due on Tuesday, really? Do we need to know how water flows through a tree?" He asks.

"That's a really good question, like, when are we ever going to need that information in the real world?" I say. Jessica shakes her head,

"But what if you ever want to keep a plant?" She asks, and we both look at her like she is crazy.

"When are you ever going to need to know that even if you do have a plant? And even if you do it's not like you are ever going to have a tree inside of your house," Rylee says. I nod in agreement. Thank goodness Jessica isn't making this all weird.

"So, Rylee, have you ever thought about being trans or maybe gay?" Jessica says. I spoke too soon. I tried saving the now awkward conversation:

"I don't think he could be gay, or homo. He doesn't have the body for it," I point to him and lean my head closer to Jessica's so she can see where I am pointing. Rylee looks stunned.

"Oh, you don't think I have the body for it, huh?" He gets up and starts strutting around the toppings section. Oh, dear Lord thank you for saving my butt in this situation... He looks ridiculous.

"Umm... I don't know what to think about that. 1. Stereotypical much? 2. That was pathetic. Here's how you really do it," I get up and strut around the toppings section and they both start laughing. I'm laughing too. When I get back to our table Jessica said,

"My turn!" and then she was doing it. Oh my gosh I have a strange group of friends. After that chaos, when the laughter died down, Jessica looked at me and whispered,

"Nailed it!" I nodded and smiled. She was good. I hear a ding coming from the door when someone walks in. I know exactly who it is when I smell the cologne. Mr. Cologne Bomb himself, Nate Williams. Great. He is definitely the hottest guy in school, and the most popular. And the most gay. Yup, the hottest guys in school is gay. He flirts with me too much and right now isn't the time for it. He looks over at our table and sits down across from me.

"He Rylee," he mumbles, "Hey, Sam! Funny seeing you here huh? I was, just wondering if you wanted to go out with me sometime, but it seems as if you are already occupied," he gets up out of his chair and walks out of the door. Stalker.

"What the crap was that about?" Jessica asks.

"He hits on me every single freaking time he sees me. It's like a hobby of his or something," I shake my head and look down glumly at my empty froyo cup. Why does it get eaten so quickly?

I look over at Rylee. He looks back at me. Why does my life have to be so complicated? I smile and stand up, push my chair in and throw my froyo cup away and they do the same. I look at them.

"So, what do you want to do now?" I ask. Jessica raises a finger.

"I have just the idea," she grabs our hands and pulls us out the door.