Falling from Grace - Bridgerton

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Her breath caught not letting her escape the panic that shook her lungs. Panic was a feeling Grace tried not to let behold her often. The feeling as if a monster was to swallow her whole but she could not see nor hear it only know what was coming.

She reached for the first glass she could, a tall thin glass shell encasing a bubbling alcoholic liquid. Not caring of the consequences Grace downed it in seconds and reached for another, her head becoming lightheaded instantly as she stumbled towards cold air outside.

Grace's hands dug into the pinch of the cube cut hedge as she shut her eyes hoping to relieve herself from the burning of her insides.

"Grace," a soft voice filled the distance, a voice that had once filled her with hoped now danced in her sorrows.

"Well this feels awfully familiar." She mused taking a smaller sip of the bitter drink, hoping to numb herself even more as Anthony stood watching her, defeated, at a loss for words.

"What are you doing out here?"

"Meditating."

Anthony saw the glass held between her fingers, and yet her sarcasm seemed to have no effect on him but pity

"Are you sure you should be drinking that in your... in your condition?"

Grace laughed but with no joy present in her voice. For once she would let the world consume her, maybe that was what it wanted all along.

"Because I'm pregnant. You can say it tis not like everyone won't know in a few hours."

He came over to her reaching for the glass in her hand but she pushed him away pointing a finger at him Grace's words wavering, "Don't touch me."

Anthony sighed and nodded, retreating to put his hands behind his back.

They stood in silence watching one another, Grace's hand shook as it held the glass but she wouldn't break, not now, not here, not in front of him.

"What are you doing here?"

Anthony's expression didn't change as he spoke such soft words, "I really do not know."

"You never know do you? Maybe that Anthony Bridgerton's big fault he never knows what he wants." Anthony just watched as Grace raised her glass to him, her back against the railing as she brought it to her lips, "Well here is to not knowing then."

"And you do know Grace? What you want?"

She smiled at him, "I do. I want to go to the ocean," Her eyes were glazed as if life itself had been drained from them, "I would emerge myself completely into the water and stay there until I feel my lungs might burst,"

Anthony still watched in confusion, she had said things like this before about the ocean and the beauty of the world but never in such a dark manner.

"And at the last second I come up from the water and take that gasping breath I need. That is what I want."

"Why?"

"Because that is the feeling I have when I see you." These moments seem to occur so prominently between them, one voicing that they still had hope and love but it was taken away too soon, "But the world is the ocean and it wishes to pull me under until I must breathe once more."

Anthony walked towards her, frost peeling from the open wound that covered his heart as all fear and hatred subsided. Once again he imagined they were still in that field in Hastings.

"And what if a great ship came to pull you out?"

"Then I would stay aboard as long as I could," Her face was close to his, she could feel his breath tickle her skin as it exited his nose, the warmth of his palm covering hers, a comfort Grace never felt she would have again.

"We do not have to continue this game I am so tired of playing. Please, may we call some truce before I may never see you again? I do not want your love, nor do I deserve it, but acquaintances, mutual acquaintances may subside. At least until we can be something more. "

Grace shook her head, her hand over hand coming to his bicep, forehead meeting his shoulder as she breathed in the scent of him.

"But we are not mutual aquaintinces Anthony, we are not lovers, or enemies, or even strangers. We are only people with memories that one day we will tell to our separate children in our separate homes. We are not meant to live a life together, we are supposed to live with the hope of what might've been."

Anthony's arms wrapped around her, palm splayed across her hair to keep Grace close as if afraid she may float away, "I'd like to believe we have some control over our fate." He whispered and Grace smiled again against the fabric of his coat, "Then I wish you well to pursue that, but it has never done me much good."

They stood together like this for a few moments more, out of sight of others. That was until a voice caught Anthony's ears making him to pull away, "What, what is it?" Missing the touch she so longed for.

"I thought I just heard-"

"Stop walking!"

Grace pulled away too now hearing a voice she knew much too well, "SImon?" she spoke almost to herself. She turned around to see Simon diligently following after Daphne into the maze of bushes and vines.

"He's with your sister," She spoke quietly and Anthony's demeanour changed instantly, "He what?!"

"The maze theyve- No, Anthony, wait!" But it was to late as was now stumbling after him as Anthony entered the maze as well just as SImon and Daphne had done minutes earlier searching for them.

"Anthony! Stop!" Grace continued to race after him finally grabbing ahold of his arm, "Whatever is going on, you mustn't intervene."

"Shes my sister!"

"She deserves to fight her own battles." With a pull Anthony wrenched out of her grasp and began walking quickly to find the pair.

"Anthony!"

But Grace halted once she saw the scene in front of her. Simon catching her eye newly parted from a gasping Daphne and a fuming Anthony

"I told you saying goodbye was a good idea." She smiled

A/N

Woo hoo
New chapter! 

And hello we finally got to the amazing maze scene woot woot

Also a note on this chapter I am not encouraging the consumption of alchohal while being pregnant they were not aware of the effects and also they did use the term pregnant as well as "with child" (I did my research$ so please do not criticize me on that.

I have heard your requests and endless messages so the next story I will write will most likely be a peaky blinders fic with an OC I already created named Charlotte but don't worry this story is far (but not too far) from over.

Have an amazing week

Love love love
WCP