In The Nick Of Time

CHAPTER 22

CHAPTER 22

Summary:

"It's better to act like it doesn't hurt, than to admit that it's killing you."

The next day passed and it was seemingly painful. Liam was shaking more than he had in those tiny moments before, he couldn't stomach the thought of leaving the place he's known for almost two weeks now. Day fourteen is when he would be put in a car, and he'd drive twenty minutes back to Leeds. It was now day thirteen and he was standing in the door way of Zayn's bedroom, Zayn was by the bed putting the four pairs of sweatpants into a bag with the three shirts that now belonged to Liam. He was packing Liam's things together.

The sun was setting behind the house already and Liam shuffled against the door way again as Zayn looked over his shoulder for the thousandth time, finally he stepped aside and sat down beside the bag. He looked to Liam, folding his hand forward. "Come here." He whispered.

Liam complied with a dreadful expression, his eyes downed when Zayn's hands pulled him closer by his hips and rested his head on his stomach. He kissed it and looked up at Liam. Liam stood in Zayn's pants, and his shirt. In his home, and in his room. Everything was his.

Zayn kissed his shirt covered stomach again, glancing into his eyes. "You're going to hate me forever, aren't you?"

He shook his head, his voice hoarse, "I'd never hate you." His hands rested on Zayn's biceps.

"But you'd think I'm crazy for letting you go."

"You're not-."

"But I am."

"Stop it."

Zayn rubbing his hands into Liam's hips, staring up at him. "You always told me - that I never would explain myself. That I'm always a closed book." He mumbled, "I was always alone because I didn't want to be around people I couldn't love."

Liam shook his head, "Stop."

"After the incident, I had a memory of when I got lost in this grand mall some where in the city. My sister ran off and my mom told me to stay put, I was ten and I stood there on that bench." He halted entirely only to massage his hands into Liam's sides this time. "After a while I started panicking because my mom didn't come back, so I got up and started searching for her." He swayed his head, glancing up at Liam then back to his stomach. "I went around the place about ten times, and I didn't find her." He licked his lips, looking to his hands. "Turns out she was looking for me, panicking, and running to security." He scoffed, "They found me after an hour, crying by some wishing fountain. When I was there, before they found me, I made a wish." He gulped, "I wished that I wouldn't have to worry about any one else, that when the time came I would turn numb so that I wouldn't have to care about anything any more."

He closed his eyes, then opened them again.

"I guess that came true after it all happened. Six years later, I woke up in a hospital because I got stabbed when some guys just wanted some money and to see some one in pain." He shook his head, "Six years later and here I am, living in the same house that watched me hold onto my own life when I thought I wouldn't." He laughed, but it was dry and nervous. "Guess some spells only last a while before you're off worrying about whether some one's comfortable on your couch, or if they feel comfortable around you. After all, the highest walls built always come down the hardest."

He looked up at Liam, tears in Liam's eyes as he looked anything close to remorse and pity for Zayn.

"You wanted to know why I'm always closed off?" He stared to his hand, "It's better to act like it doesn't hurt, than to admit that it's killing you." His lips quivered the slightest bit held together as he stared into Liam's eyes now, they were glossy and beautiful against the sunset dark blue sky behind. "So, when you go out tomorrow, when you go back home - I'm not going to admit that it's killing me." He exhaled, "Because I already know it hurts."