Rock God

Chapter Sixteen: Miss James

(Before we get started with this chapter here's the song mentioned in it. :P)

"Ugh, nothing smells worse than wet dog." Jesus said as He walked Samson into the house with Hope by His side.

"Yeah, you're right, but he sure is a cute little doggie." Hope said as she scratched Samson behind the ears while DJ slowly came down the stairs.

"So, how did everything go?" Hope asked him.

"It all went great and we leave first thing tomorrow morning." He replied with a grin but that's when suddenly Jesus folded His arms at him.

"Uh Dad, aren't you forgetting something?" He questioned him. "Mick and his friends have school tomorrow." He pointed out.

"Oh poop." DJ replied with a slap of his forehead. "My age must be getting to me. I know everything, but I don't necessarily remember everything! I never thought I would be the one saying this,.. but help me Jesus!! You've just got to help me!! We need to make it to the concert tomorrow we just have to! It's literally a matter between life and death!!" He cried out as Jesus just simply let out a chuckle.

"Relax, I have a plan. A plan that doesn't involve sinning,.. just a high level of forgiveness and being a good sport." He replied.

"I don't like the sound of that." DJ responded with a shake of his head.

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"Can you please remind me why I'm dressed up like Mrs. Claus when she's on holiday?" DJ questioned the next day as he now had on a gray wig that was tied into a bun, a purple rimmed hat with a bow, a purple gown with matching flats and a sweater overtops of it, and a pair of spectacles with golden clip-on earrings. He also had on some light blue eyeshadow, blush, false eyelashes, and bright red lipstick.

Jesus chuckled. "Well since God is everywhere and in everybody then He could also be in an old woman for one so that wouldn't be a lie, and for two,.. all you have to do is tell Mick's teacher that you're wanting to take him and his friends to a concert and that wouldn't be a lie either. You don't have to mention what kind of concert it is, let them work that part out for themselves." Jesus said with a thunderous laugh.

"Jesus you are a genius!!" DJ began. "But they're bound to see something's off when I have legs as hairy as a grizzly bear and a hotdog without a bun!" He snapped inside a whisper.

"Yeah, and you're also lopsided." Jesus replied while He started to fix him when suddenly I started walking downstairs.

"What's going on here?" I questioned as I came to a stop on the landing as DJ suddenly let out a rather loud gasp of astonishment and looked up at me.

"Mickey, this isn't what it looks like!" He cried out. "I'll explain on the way to school." He told me.

"Oh yeah, school,.. I forgot about that part. I'm late too and Mom is probably going to pitch a fit." I replied.

"Don't worry, I'll help you get out of it." DJ reassured me.

"Looking like that!?" I questioned him in complete and utter disbelief and bewilderment while my eyes started widening.

"I said that I would explain everything on the way!!" DJ cried out. "Man, first the cross and now this. The things I do for my children." He said with a roll of his eyes. "By the way, I need a woman's honest opinion," he began as he turned to look at Hope. "Does this dress make me look fat?" He inquired.

"Do you even hear yourself right now? Or rather do you hear what I hear?" I questioned him?"

"Yes!!" He mock sobbed. "I'm turning into a mere mortal!!" He cried out as I stifled a laugh and got a handkerchief out of his sweater pocket and blew his nose.

"Well it's like what you always say Dad, you made them from your image." Jesus began. "Just thankfully you didn't look like that at the beginning of creation." He finished.

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"So I was wondering if you would let me bring my dear young laddie and his charming little friends with me to the concert." DJ said in his best old lady voice that sounded a bit southern while snickers broke throughout the room and Caleb scrunched up his face in confusion.

"DJ?" He questioned quietly and that's when I just pointed over at him and made a slicing head motion with my finger signaling him that I would kill him if he said another word and he got the message and quickly shut up.

"Will it be educational?" Ms. Wright inquired while DJ elbowed me in the ribs for threatening Caleb.

"Ouch!" I cried out.

"I think you can safely say madam that there will be a lesson involved that they won't ever forget." DJ replied in the same voice.

"Okay then whatever just take them, but you'll still have to sign them out Ms.???" Ms. Wright responded in a questioning voice.

"James Madam and it was a very lovely experience to have met you, Caroline." He replied while giving her a curtsey.

"That's funny, I don't remember giving you my first name." She said but we had already raced out the door before we could hear her response and that's when DJ gently shoved my shoulder and pushed up the spectacles on his nose.

"You. Owe. Me. BIG time." He told me while Caleb and I lowered our heads and tried to hide our laughter as we exchanged glances.

"Alright, come on. Let's just go get Logan and Josh." I said before we quickly hurried on our way. The next thing I knew is that all five of us were in the car on the road to the concert with Josh blasting "Dude Looks Like A Lady" from his iPod and everybody except DJ (who looked like his normal self once again) was singing it on top of their lungs.

"I just got you boys out of school and this is the thanks I get!? Typical." He said with a roll of his eyes.

"Sorry DJ, you really rock dude." Josh told him while patting him on the shoulder.

"Yeah, you are a totally awesome God." I replied with a grin without thinking as all three of the other boys turned their heads to look at me and the song ended. You could hear a pin drop.