be my mistake. (emily prentiss)

iii

in my sad, borderline drunken haze, i let jade fuck me. she was good, but she didn't have jennifer's slender, trained fingers. hell, maybe she did; i'm just biased.

i miss how jj used to kiss me. it was so soft, but so powerful. i loved running my fingers through her long blonde hair as she went down on me.

i started to do the same to jade, running my fingers through her hair as she pumped her fingers into me. this made her smile up at me, her taking it as an indication that she was doing a good job.

she curled her fingers, hitting that spot that drove me absolutely insane.

"god, jen." i moan.

i feel her stop, and i try to contain my surprise at the words that just came out of my mouth.

"what did you just say?"

"i said 'god, jade'. what else would i-"

she stops me, "you said jen."

i try to laugh it off, "what? no i didn't."

"but you did." she says in disbelief, "you fucking did."

i watch in silence as she goes over to the sink and begins to quickly wash her hands.

"god, i can't believe this." she says, "penelope did tell me that i looked like jj. i guess i should have paid more attention to that."

"jade, wait." i say, walking towards her.

she holds up the hand she just dried, "no, don't even. i can't even look at you right now."

"look, i'm sorry."

she shakes her head, "it's too late for that. i've gotta go."

she looks up at me, her baby blue eyes filling with tears, "have fun watching your girlfriend dance with her new husband. i'm sorry i can't be her."

jade's words cut me like a knife, and i watched in stunned silence as she walked out the door.