You Robbed My Heart - Jesse Klaver X Rob Jetten AU Fanfiction

Chapter 4

About halfway down the route, we sit down for a break. "Get over here," Jesse says, gesturing that I should sit close to him. "We're not at work," he winks. I gladly do as he says but when I lean over to kiss him, but he stops me. "Wait, Rob, I feel like we need to talk about some stuff," he says. I smile, "Can't we talk later?" I run my hand across his chest. He takes my hand and presses it against his lips, "No." Knowing Jesse usually gets his way anyway, I sight, "Alright then, but just one kiss first." He raises one eyebrow, but I purse my lips and he gives in, probably recognizing I'm as stubborn as he is. Before I know it, his lips are pressed against mine and he kisses me in the kind of passionate manly manner that makes my heart beat faster. When he pulls back, he scooches away a bit, as to create enough distance to avoid further temptation. I follow his lead and go sit across from him while opening the pack of cookies I brought along.

"Don't you feel bad that you're going behind your boyfriend's back?", he asks. Immediately his head turns red, thinking I'm offended by that question. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be harsh," he continues, "I just mean like what's up with that, because personally I feel kind of bad for my wife, you know." I nod, trying to get him to relax a bit while taking another bite of my cookie. "I get it.", I answer when my mouth is empty again. "This probably is a good moment to mention that we have an open relationship," I say, with a sheepish grin on my face. Jesse sights out of pure relief and then starts laughing, "Jesus Rob you couldn't have told me that sooner?" I frown, not really understanding what he means. "All this time I've been feeling so bad about, know you," he gestures to us, "this." Ah, now I know what he means. Huh, I guess I could've mentioned that sooner. Oh well. "Sorry, but to be honest, the fact that you still kissed me like that, while thinking that I wasn't allowed to kiss anyone but my boyfriend, that's pretty hot. Not going to lie about that," I say, while quickly touching my lips where his were just a minute ago. Jesse chuckles and his cheeks turn red. "Seriously though," he says, "Why did I not know this before?" I shrug, "I don't know." But he does not accept my answer. "Rob," he says, "I've known you for a while now and I'll admit that you can be quite the enigma at times, but I am certain that you rarely 'don't know' something. You're smart. You think things through. So, out with it. Why didn't you tell me?" Now it's my turn to blush, sort of surprised that Jesse apparently paid such close attention to me. "I don't really tell people," I answer after a brief silence, "because, you know, for a considerable part of the Netherlands I'm already pushing the boundaries of tolerance by just being gay. I do not feel an urge to add a whole new layer of 'freakish' to that. An open relationship is not a concept a lot of people, or voters for that matter, can rally behind." Carefully I look up at Jesse, hoping that he will accept this answer. He looks back and raises one eyebrow. Damn it, he knows there is more. I can't help but laugh, albeit a bit awkwardly. Jesse still hasn't said anything, so I continue while looking at my hands, "Besides, it's not like I'm making a lot of use of it. If I'm being honest, it always was more Stefan's idea. He's the one doing the sleeping around and stuff, because I work so much." I look up, hoping I didn't get too depressing just right now. Jesse smiles but before he can say anything, I continue talking, "But honestly, I'm fine with it. I love my job, and in this way, I can have an amazing boyfriend and an amazing job at the same time. And, you know, sometimes just making out with someone else is also kind of nice. Also, we've been together for years. I know it's not how most people would do it but–" Jesse interrupts me by putting his hand on my knee. "Rob, you don't have to defend your life, as long as you're happy," he says. I feel my head turning red again, but I'm also relieved that he isn't grossed out by the whole open relationship concept. 

"So, how about you?" I ask, to change the subject. "What has led you to risk your entire marriage and family to go on a date with a dude?" I meant it as a joke but as soon as I said it, I realized it was quite harsh. Jesse smiles a bit pitiful and removes his hand from my knee. "I'm sorry," I continue, "I didn't mean to hurt you." Jesse nods and says, "Don't worry about it, it's fine. We're both thinking it anyways, or at least I was, so why not say it? Makes whatever this is easier, I think. But please, keep this a secret. I don't want anyone to know." "Good call, I'll leave this out of the retelling of this afternoon when I catch up with Stefan over brunch." I answer, a bit sarcastic. What is he thinking? That I'm going straight to the press with this? Jesse frowns. "Rob I'm serious," he says. "I know, I know. I'm not though, I mean I am not telling anyone we hung out," I say, trying to get him to relax a little. "Isn't that what you're supposed to do though in open relationships?" He asks, a bit surprised. I shrug, "I guess so, but I know what would happen if this got out. At least, I don't know what would happen but I don't want to find out either because I do know it won't be good." Jesse grins a bit painfully, "Thanks. Yeah, I prefer not to think about it too much either. So, you don't trust your boyfriend?" Playfully I poke his arm, "Hey, don't change the subject, we were talking about you and your wife. And when we're done with that, I have some pending questions about your sexuality." He chuckles, "Alright, fair enough. Why don't we start walking again?" 

We quickly get back on our feet, but Jesse doesn't start talking right away, as if he is trying to figure out what to say. "Jolein and I, we're not as happy and in-sync as we used to be. Don't know what else to tell you," he eventually says. "So, why not get divorced?" I ask. He shrugs and says "Why not tell people you're in an open relationship? Because of the media of course. Divorce is already such an extreme, hurtful measure, when you're not under public scrutiny. Besides, we have kids and I love the family life we have." Jesse looks a bit sad, and I take his hand to show him that I'm here for him. "I get it," I say, "No idea if this makes you feel any better, but Stefan and I... I feel like we used to be more in love, you know?" He nods, "But over time it becomes a habit, sharing your life with this one person, not being able to picture your life without them. But what can you do?" I don't know the answer to that question, so I stay silent and for a while we just walk hand in hand without saying anything.

"Now you have me to talk about it though, if you want," I say after ten minutes or so. He looks up, "Are you serious?" I nod, "Yeah of course. I get not wanting to talk about problems because of the media attention we receive. I mean, I know how easily stuff gets out when you're under public scrutiny. But we already have a tiny secret, haven't we? So why not add one more?" This makes Jesse laughs out loud. "Why not," he says when he's finished laughing, and with that said he pulls me in his arms for a long hug.