What would you call it? {•vkook•}

V.

If you asked 14 years old taehyung if he believed in love at first sight, then he would have answered with a simple "no".

but now if you asked 17 years old taehyung if he believed in love at first sight, then he will answer with a very pained "yes".

it was hard, moving on was hard especially when this person was your only reason but sometimes it doesn't go your way.

what was love anyway? isn't love at first sight really stupid? tae would agree cause it is stupid. you fall in love with a person or with the idea of person, with the visual of a person. it's like you create version of a someone and ideal one at that and then you just... fall in love with it. is it even real love? cause for taehyung it was. no matter how stupid it sounded, how ridiculous it looks for him it was what he calls "destiny and fate". a guy that he met in the street and fell in love with so happened to be his schoolmate. he also happened to take same dance classes as his best friend. for tae, he was meant to fall in love with cute bunny looking male, he was supposed to fall in love but nothing else was bound to happen because that was how fate worked for tae. maybe something would have happened if tae were social enough or brave enough but he wasn't.

never once did tae want to fall in love again. the feeling of being so emotionally depended on a person that you don't know really brought him many problems, such as this constant feeling of loneliness, betrayal, sadness. it was weird. taehyung didn't want to feel like this anymore, feel like how he felt when he was 14, feeling choked up, useless, ugly and really really fucking sad.

every once in a while tae thinks about his first love and sometimes wants to know how he looks now. but he is too scared to look him up. too scared he will get interested again, addicted again and he can't let that happen now. you know now that he is finally free, he wants to let this go. not telling anyone but his little diary know that he has at home. writing about it feels like some big rocks were lifted from his heart.

sometimes it gets hard again. sometimes when he feels attracted to someone he gets scared and completely ignores his feelings untill they feel numb again.

"you just haven't loved anyone yet" was now pink haired males words that made tae think hard. "maybe i have but it was so painful that i decided not to do it again"- it came out as a chuckle but if anyone knew his story, they would also know that it was true. sadly his friends didn't know so for them it was tae being his usual funny self. "hahaa yah as if"- his pretty pink hair bounced on his head. *yah as if chim... as if*.

sometimes we are bound to meet someone but nothing can ever work out from it and it is fine. now it is fine. over time it will be fine. as much as tae wanted to forget about it he couldn't and he got used to it. he could never forget the feeling but he forgot something. he forgot elders charming smile, forgot little stars that were shining brightly like galaxies in the sky, forgot the beautiful skin that would glow and mix in pretty atmosphere, forgot the glance and sound of laughter that would leave elders lips, god he forgot his lips too, that pretty lips that had natural pink glow on them, that small mole and that stupid scar on his cheek. tae forgot about them but he still remembers the feeling of butterflies in his stomach, remembers the hot feeling he would get just by having an eye contact with his first love. he remembers and he will continue to remember. he won't miss it but he will learn to get get used to it... correction, he already learnt it.

at least now he doesn't think that love is an illusion, that it doesn't exist because it does and it's beautiful just that one sided one is not beautiful or worth anything, only thing it did was to teach taehyung that love was somewhere out there and it would get to him too, maybe not now but sometime it would.

............................................................................

"oh. my. god, TAE isn't that jeon jungkook?" hoseok was pointing at somewhere with his pinky and suddenly colours drained from brown haired males face. quickly looking in elders direction he answered "oh yah, haha that's him... mmm anyway chim? yoongs? let's hurry up or I'll be late for my tutoring lessons". all three boys agree and started leaving the place, not noticing taehyung who was trying to leave faster, trying to avoid looking at black haired males face too long, afraid he would memorise elders face again, that he would fall again.

TADAAA DONE DONE DONE DONE, I FINALLY FINISHED FANFIC AYEEEE. this is my first ever finished fic and I'm kinda proud of it 🤭🤭🤭 anyway hope you liked it. if there is anything wrong with it pls let me know. bai baiii💜

but the real question is what would you call it? what would you call this love...