27. Awareness

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After finishing the tea-colored hot water, Philip stood up. "I shall brew you some."

At that time, I was still confused and silent.

"...Would it be alright for me to watch? I also want to learn how to brew tea properly."

"It's fine. If you're alright with me, let me teach you."

"Thank you."

After he had kindly agreed, we entered the kitchen together. Philip taught me how to brew tea so carefully, that even a child could understand it. Looking at his hand, I thought that his fingertips were beautiful.

Eventually, we returned to the room with fresh cups of tea.

"..."

After sitting down on the sofa, I noticed I had sat in the wrong spot.

I just sat down next to Philip as though we were still beside each other in the kitchen. I could feel his gaze on me. I was so embarrassed, I wished the earth would open up and swallow me.

It was when I felt uneasy and was about to move away,

"Kya...!"

Suddenly, thunder struck—it was the loudest one yet. The whole building shook as if there was an earthquake. At the same time, the power went out. The inside of the room became pitch black. I was so scared, I clung to Philip.

Immediately, he put his arms around my back. He gently repeated, "It's alright." many times.

From time to time, he'd rub my back. It was akin to magic. In no time at all, my fear was alleviated.

"...Thank, you."

"No problem."

After that, I lost track of time.

For some reason, I felt at ease within Philip's arms. His gentle, nice, scent. His warmth. The rapid beating of his heart was terribly pleasant to hear.

Because of that, my eyelids grew heavier.

"...I'm glad I'm with you today."

"Eh?"

"It's an unavoidable situation, but if you were to do this with another man, I wouldn't be able to stand it."

He muttered that Rex was no exception.

...Not like I'd do it with Rex. Even the mere idea filled me with nausea.

"It's alright"

"...?"

"I can only do this with Phil."

Before I noticed it, such words smoothly came out of my mouth.

However, it was the truth. I couldn't really imagine a situation in which I'd be hugging someone other than him.

After muttering that, I was so sleepy, I couldn't stand it. I slowly closed my eyes. Before I could hear Philip's next word, I fell into a dream.

***

"...Mm."

When my eyelids slowly fluttered open, I could see the bright sunshine.

As I blinked several times, I found myself basking in both warmth and a nice scent.

As I awakened, I realized it—

no way!

I hurriedly raised my face.

"Good morning."

At a surprisingly narrow distance, I saw Philip. He laughed softly, just like the sun. Basking in the afterglow of the rising sun, he looked extremely dazzling.

At the same time, I finally noticed that I was firmly holding his clothes.

"I, I..."

"Last night, you fell asleep in this position. I couldn't bring myself to wake you. Besides, you grabbed my clothes and wouldn't let go. As such, I've been here the entire time."

"Eh."

I glanced at the clock—it was already morning.

I wondered if Philip had even sleep at all. I profusely apologized.

"I'm truly sorry, Phil, have you slept?"

"No problem. I slept a little, so it's okay."

That was what he said, but I wondered if it was the truth. After all, with as kind as he was, he could be lying for my sake.

"...D, did you see my sleeping face?"

"Yes, it was incredibly cute."

He answered me with a straight face. I hurriedly covered my face with both hands. There was no way my sleeping face was cute!

When I was a kid, I inadvertently fall asleep on a bench in the garden. Rex told me that my sleeping face was incredibly stupid. It was so embarrassing.

"...Looking at your sleeping face, I found the true meaning of happiness."

I peeked through the gaps of my fingers—Philip had a really happy, gentle, expression. Afterwards, I couldn't bear to stare at his face for a while.

As if the storm yesterday had been nothing but a lie, the sky outside the window was clear.

After that, we ate the breakfast that was delivered to the room while facing each other. It made me feel strange to eat together like early morning.

If I were to someday marry him, I wondered if every morning would be spent like that.

"The way Phil eats is really beautiful."

"Is that so?"

"Yes, since long ago, I've thought, so—"

Having said that, I hurriedly retracted my words. What was I saying!? I had let my guard down!

When I glanced at Philip in a hurry, he was staring at me with extreme surprise.

"Have your memories returned?"

"I'm not sure... my mouth moved on its own..."

"Is that so? What else do you remember?"

It was such a pathetic lie, but Philip seemed to believed it. I stroked my chest in relief.

...Originally, I should've said that my memory had returned. I didn't have any problems anymore. Rather, not having to continue lying to him would have eased me of my burden.

However, as soon as I recalled Rex's words from the other day, I had uttered another lie.

If Phil were to think my memories had returned, our relationship would surely change. Judging from the lies Philip had spouted so far, it wouldn't be strange for such an aftermath to occur. Or rather, that was something Philip would absolutely do.

At the same time, I became aware.

"...I don't remember anything else."

I hated being unable to see Philip more than anything else.

***T/N: U_U I think she'll just end up hurting him by prolonging her lies... But if I'm in her position, I wouldn't know how to be honest with him.

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