SBGC Fanfics

Minecraft's God Mod is ACTUALLY HILARIOUS

It was a normal day in Swagburg when Bees sent a message to everyone that was online.

"Everyone gather at the church of Button."

Everyone met Bees outside the church (everyone being Phobia, Sova, Alex, Moe, Reya, Zaye, Peachy, Rabbit, and Crë).

"What's going on?" Sova asked.

"You'll see," Bees replied, heading inside the church. Everyone shrugged and followed.

(Moe shrank from his full height of 20 feet to fit through the door.)

A tall figure stood inside the church, wearing a suit that constantly flickered with bits of RGB.

"This is Mr. Doxx," Bees gestured to the man. "He's god. God, give us a speech."

Everyone gathered around Mr. Doxx, anxiously awaiting the parable that he would surely preach.

Mr. Doxx cleared his throat, then began to speak. "B- ee-mgd--fsh--k"

"Yeah, uh, I don't know what the fuck you're saying, man." Phobia looked (way) up at Bees, who shrugged.

"We're not worthy enough to understand his words," Reya sniffed.

"Sorry, Mr. Doxx, your voice is illegible," Crë shook her head sadly.

Mr. Doxx glitched angrily, stomping his foot. Then he glitched so hard that it erased him from the mainframe, and he disappeared.
The room was silent.

"We killed God in Minecraft?" Reya suggested weakly.

"That's funny, cos I'm god actually," Phobia declared. Then she gasped as a sword slid through their stomach.

Alex retracted the sword from Phobia's body and wiped it on his cape. "I've been waiting a long time to fight god. That was so much easier than I expected."

"That's because she's not god either," Bees giggled, knowing the truth.

"Who is it then?" Alex asked.

At that moment, Crë began to glow violently. Moe, who had been looking at her, was blinded by the holy light.

Alex looked at god, wondering whether he should attack his number one fan.

"If you so much as scratch me, I will stop simping over you," Crë declared.

"Nooooo," Alex cried. Everyone knew he drew his power from the dumb American girls who simped over his voice.

Crë felt bad for Alex, because she knew fighting god was his only goal in life. She stopped glowing.

"How about this," Crë said. "We'll do a round of 5v5 skywars. Alex, you can be on the team that's against me, so you're technically fighting me."

    Everyone decided this was fair, and were excited to get a chance at killing everyone they hated. Crë and Alex were nominated for team captains, and Crë generously allowed Alex to pick first.

    "Phobia." Alex said without thinking. The three foot tall child groaned from where she lay in their own blood. Crë sighed and smote him. Phobia became a ghost named Phoby and joined Alex's team.

"Moe." Crë realized the poor boy had been just standing there because he was now blind. She took him by the arm and guided him to stand next to her. Then Crë made a blindfold materialize and wrapped it around Moe's face. This gave him the ability to see again, because two negatives make a positive.

"Sova."

"Bees."

"Zaye."

"Reya."

"Peachy."

"Rabbit."

The battle was set to be in the Nether, where Crë could use her powers to set up an arena. Phoby helped her, because their building skills had increased now that she was dead.

Finally the map was complete, and the teams were ready to fight. Crë and Phoby had added cool little armories so they could choose their armor and weapons.

Once everyone was ready, the battle began.

Phoby was not very interested in fighting anyone, and instead hung out with Zaya while Alex fought Moe. Phoby realised she has knockback 12 hands, and started jumpscaring people. She freaked out Rabbit, who fell into the lava and died lollll.

Bees fought Zaye and won easily.

Alex and Crë traded bowshots, acting cocky even though they were both missing because they're both literal dogwater at long range combat.

At some point Bees and Peachy switched teams.

Phoby forgot they existed for a bit. Then they remembered and punched Peachy off a cliff.

Suddenly a voice boomed down from the heavens, immediately halting the battle. "STOP THIS AT ONCE!"

    Everyone looked around in confusion, except Crë, who sighed and shouldered her axe.

"Hello, brother." She rolled her eyes at Moe. "He's always been a bit of a drama queen."

    "NO I AM NOT SHUT UP CRË." The voice cleared its throat. "ANYWAY, I AM YOUR TRUE GOD."

    "Not this again," Crë sounded so done. "We've been through this so many times. Mr. Doxx gets the Overworld, I get the Nether, you get the End. It's not that hard."

"YOU WERE IN THE OVERWORLD WHAT DO YOU MEANNNN"

"I wasn't using my powers!"

"BITcH EVERYONE SAW YOU LIGHT UP LIKE A GLOWSTICK"

"Yeah, well, shut up," Crë said. Everyone nodded, she made a good point.

"DON'T NOD THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE." The voice trapped Crë in a fish tank and she drowned. In the Nether.

Everyone was amazed that the Voice had the power to drown someone in hell. Alex wept, as half of his simp power came from Crë. Phoby cried too, because Crë was secretly his favorite.

    "Who are you, god of the End?" Bees asked. "We must know!"

    "I AM..." The voice paused for dramatic effect.

    "I AM ANOTHERTTVVIEWER."