Our love story~Eien x Shinsou

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Hello guys, it's me the author of this story.

I don't know what to do anymore, I feel numb, I'm about to graduate high school, I applied to my dream college but I got rejected. Usually people will cry if they get rejected by their dream college but I didn't, I just stared at the screen and that's it.

I tried to think positive but eh it's not working anymore. To be honest I don't know what to do anymore.

I don't even know if I'm gonna continue this story. I was going to discontinue this story but I didn't want to leave you guys hanging so I won't discontinue it.

However, I might take long to make new chapters and post them so I'm extremely sorry.

I'm starting to have some health problems. I let myself go and I injured my knee, I've been bearing this pain for 4 months now.

I didn't listen to my parents and friends, to stop play volleyball or to tell my coach about the pain. I never brought it up until the season was over and now I can't walk properly because I e been playing on it.

It hurts to do normal things like go up and down the stairs, sit for a long time, bend it, straighten it, run, walk, and it hurts to lift my leg.

I hate myself for doing this to myself, I really do, and I really hate that I stopped taking care of my body and let myself go.

I've been struggling to lose weight ever since I was in middle school. I would go on a diet but a diet for me means to starve yourself and to eat only one small meal a day. So I did that and ya it didn't work out.

So then I started drinking two bottle of water with two teaspoons of salt or I think it was three, I don't remember. So I will drink both bottles as quick as I can without getting caught. Please don't do this please please please don't do this it's bad for you. At the time I knew it was bad for me but at the moment I didn't really care I just wanted to lose weight and look perfect in my parents eyes and family members.

When I realized that none of these would work so I just ate my feelings and ya. I've been having a hard time to sleep, so I had to take these gummy's to put me to sleep. (I struggle drinking big pills okay don't judge me.....nvm you could judge me it's quite funny)

So I've really haven't been myself and I also want to know how you guys are.

If you guys are going through some hardships right now and have no one to rant to, you could privately message me and I will try my best to cheer you up 😊

Thank you for listening to my dumb rant and I hope you guys are eating well, staying healthy, drinking enough water, taking care of yourself, and loving yourself 😁

Please stay strong, love you all goodbye 💜