Part 1: Hello There

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It was a brisk Sunday morning, y/n are woken up by the fucking cry of a kids park spinney majig so you throw a brick through the window (you hit the kids you hero) just in time to be a dickhead to everyone else!

You start off by having a 2 hour twitter rant about why you should kill all men and being bullied off the platform. "Today seems to be going well" y/n say to yourself. You smile with your crusty ass teeth and go downstairs to have your daily 7 am glass of red wine (obviously) and you go out without eating breakfast so people can be forced to  listen to you moan about how you're hungery

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