How To Tame An Empress (BOOK I)

Chapter 40- The Difference of Then & Now

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She stepped back, calming herself down and using the back of her hand to wipe her tears away before closing her eyes for a short few seconds and opening them again, a defiant fire burning in those hazel eyes of hers, stronger now than ever before.

"This marriage is broken," She quietly said.

I furrowed my brows at her words. Broken?... After everything I went through to try and fix it, to try and keep her from straying from my side, she is now telling me that this marriage of ours which was once so beautiful, is now broken.

But at least, I can understand why she thinks so.

"Ria..." I gently called, stepping forward and outstretching a hand to cup her cheek but she turned away, taking a step back away from me, and with that action, I felt myself flinch.

"It's broken beyond repair... I can no longer... Be part of this marriage," She whispered, scrunching her face up with those words as if she had just stabbed a sword through her chest. She may as well have just stabbed that sword through my chest instead.

"Ria, what are you-"

"-Stacius," She suddenly called me by the nickname that I loved so much and I didn't know how to reply so, instead, I just stayed silent and waited for her to speak.

"I wonder where it's all gone?" She spoke more to herself than me.

As if she were a priceless jewel that would break if I touched her too carelessly, I cautiously took a step forward and when she didn't move back, I raised my hands and held onto her forearms but when I did that, her head moved down to avoid my gaze.

"All that love I once had for you... I wonder where it has all gone..." And I froze.

"Ria, what are you- I mean... Yes, I now understand that trying to make you jealous was wrong on my end, but I was just doing to you what you did to me. Do you know how angry I feel every time I see you talking and smiling at Claudius in the way that you used to do to me? With every day that passes by, it is as though you are drifting further and further away from me-"

"And you thought sleeping with another woman would suddenly make me love you so much more?" She said, looking up at me with a confused look.

"I thought making you jealous was the correct way to go,"

"And?... Are you happy with the outcome?" She asked.

"Of course not. Despite how beautiful you are when you cry, I love you most when you smile... But you don't smile at me anymore,"

"That is because I have nothing to smile for," Her words slapped me in the face.

"Surely, you cannot be serious... I was wrong this time, I admit that now and Ria, I am sorry, darling... Forgive me and I will make it up to you. I will never sleep with another woman again. Honestly, this one time that I did it was horrible,"

"What will happen once I forgive you?" She mumbled.

"What will happen?" I repeated, unsure of what she meant.

"I have forgiven you countless times for countless of your wrongdoings but how many more times must I have to forgive you for me to finally be able to truly smile a happy smile again?... Stacius, I cannot do this anymore," She eased out of my hold, smiling a small, broken smile at me before brushing her hair out of her face.

"No, Ria, you don't understand-"

"I understand perfectly well, Stacius... It is not just you trying to make me jealous by sleeping with another, this was only the final straw," Carefully, she eased out of my hold and took a step back, tucking her hair behind her ear before looking at me again.

"I thought that... as your wife... and the mother of our children, I should simply endure... But how much more of it am I expected to endure before I can finally smile a real smile again?... You broke me, Anastacius... So all I can ask of you now is to please have the decency to let me repair myself... I am broken and you cannot fix me. Maybe once, in the past, you could have... but not right now, no,"

She took another step back.

"I think it is time that we both finally let go of each other. This relationship is no longer the happy relationship that it used to be..."

I didn't know what to say and I didn't know what to do.

I could only stand there, shell-shocked as I watched her walk away from me.

"...Valeria," My voice cracked as I called after her.

She paused in her steps, turning her head over her shoulder to look at me. "I need some time right now, please," And then she was gone without another word.

I stood there silently for the next few minutes, staring at the space in front of me where Ria was once stood and I played back on all the previous events, running her words through my mind again and again until I felt myself going numb.

Turning around, I went to go sit down on Ria's side of the bed and just sat there for the next half an hour or so, possibly more.

What am I to do now? This is not what I had envisioned to happen, although, now that I think about it, what else could I have expected? 

If Ria were to sleep with another man, I would murder that other person in a cold and torturous way right there on the spot.

The way she reacted was far more responsible...

I don't even remember the face of that other woman anymore.

Sighing a deep and loud sigh, I slouched forward, resting my elbows on my knees as I ran my hands down my face, frustrated by my regretful actions... Forget about making her jealous, she had shouted the fact that she was a human and not an animal in my face. How could I ever see her as an animal?

Deciding to stop wallowing in my thoughts, I got up, going to get changed into some clothes while simultaneously thinking about ways to win back her favour. It has to be something grand and of great calibre.

It's fine, I can handle this situation like I did the previous ones, it shouldn't be too difficult. Ria is after all my wife and Empress, there is no way that she could leave me.

"There is not a single place in this Empire where she can hide from me,"

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