Quarter Breed: Revelation

Chapter 10.5- Inner Turmoil

Killians POV

We were crushed under the weight of the realization. Shaw was the man that we had all come to loathe and blame for what I had been through. However, he is not as guilty as we once thought but is our third mate to boot. This was not some book where I could reject him and another person would swoop in to fill that piece of our soul. I could feel Jun's pain at the thought of him losing his mate while the other two live happily with theirs. We already had one amazing boyfriend/mate and another that wanted us as well. How will they all react to this new development? Each of my guides only wanted their other halves, their mates, but was it possible?

"It is not something that can be figured out overnight, Killian. As I have said before, you are the host of this body and must be the one that makes the choices. However, you don't have to do it without guidance from me and the others. What kind of guides would we be if we left you to your own devices. Imagine the trouble you would get us into." Selene cooed as I laid in the provided bed. I stared at the black ceiling as the others chattered among themselves. That was until I heard something that made my blood boil.

"-Not to mention what he did to Killian, as well as us! He fed us to that couple, whether he knew what he was doing or not." She said as though they felt the same humiliation, shame, pain, and utter burden it brought me. As if they felt the shift in my mood, all eyes landed on me and I glared at them. They all shrank away from my gaze as if flames burst between us.

"Not one of you had to feel the blood between your thighs after they were done, had to clean away the seamen and sweat that they left behind inside me, or even had to see yourself in the mirror and wish you were dead so it would stop. None of you have the right to claim my disgraces, shame, indignity, or pain! I am appalled that you would even think to do so." I roared internally as I sat up on the bed. Sweat pouring from my flushed skin as anger swelled within me. Each looked back with a mixture of sadness, regret, and astonishment.

Selene wasted no time as she stepped forward and crushed me into her embrace. It was as if she was trying to both protect me and calm me at the same time. However, I was not the one that needed to be protected any longer. I was no longer that weak boy that was drugged and taken advantage of nightly. I was now stronger than most supernaturals, I was bigger and more muscular, and now I had the will to fight back.

"I'm sorry Killian, I wasn't thinking..." Amelia said, only to shrink back at the glare I aimed in her direction. I leaned into Selene's comforting embrace as she rubbed soothing circles across my back.

"That much was obvious, Amy. I know that you are all a part of my soul but none of you were there for what I went through. The most you had to do was watch as I was tormented. I was the one who had to go through all of it." I replied harshly and they all lowered their eyes like they were just as guilty. However, Selene just held me in her arms and I was grateful for the comfort as my physical body lowered itself onto the bed. It was obvious that Jun had taken over our body as he was the only one missing.

"We have all been through a lot today. I think we should call it a night." Selene whispered softly to me and led me to a very different part of our mind. Instead of looking like a white room with no windows or doors, it was pitch black with white lights floating around. We sat down and she pulled my head into her lap. It took no time at all for me to fall into a fitful sleep.

Amelia's POV

All we could do was watch as Selene led our host away from our main consciousness. Nobody said a single word as we listened to the sobs that broke free from him. Selene did not come back for a long time and when she did, she had a distraught look on her face. I wanted so dearly to ask how I could help. However, I had done and said enough that night.

"I can feel your self loathing from here. It was not like you meant to hurt him and I am sure that he knows that. However, he was right. None of us have the right to claim the sins he had to endure." Jun said, his eyes burning holes into the side of my face. However, I did not look up. It was his mate and he still took our hosts side.

"I know, I just was not thinking before I spoke. We weren't even completely assimilated when he broke free of those bastards. We have no right to share in his shame or his bravery." I replied without looking up. My eyes stared off into the darkness that surrounded us as our host slept fitfully.

"This is true... if it was not clear before, we are nothing more than guides. Even if Killian were to care for us as more than that, we are just spirits of the creatures he has in his blood." Selene said with a sad look on her face.

"You are more than that to him though. You created him to protect your own identity. You allowed him to remain in control, even though the right to do so is yours. We were meant to be your guides and yours alone." I replied and looked at Selene. With a soft look on her face, she looked over to where our replacement host rested in the shadows of our shared mind.

"It's true, Killian was never meant to exist but just as the others are... he is my beloved child. I could not allow him to suffer through everything in my stead and then snuff him out like he was worthless. If you didn't approve, you did not have to make the vow to accept him as your host." Selene replied, a sharp look in her eye as she spoke the last sentence.

"You misunderstand me, Goddess. I think I speak for all of us when I say that we have grown to love him just as you have. I just hate that we can't all share in the connection you two share. It is not as fragile as the Guide bond." I answered with my eyes aimed at the metaphorical floor of our consciousness.

"You should not be jealous of this bond as it is just as much a curse for him as it is a gift. Now that we are awake, his power is like a beacon to those who would take this power for themselves." Selene said as she rubbed her temples with dainty fingers.

"Then we need to prepare him, that is all we can do for him." Jun said as he sat back, propping himself on his elbows on something that was not there.

"As for Shaw, Can we all agree that Killian should be the one to decide his fate as our third mate? As the chosen host and the one who has suffered the most, I think it should be his choice." Samantha interjected, and returned us to the previous discussion. The others nodded in agreement with the exception of Jun who paled. It was clear as day that he was already in the mate bonds grasp.

"I will not go against Killian's decision, but I truly hope that he can forgive him for the wrong he has done. It is my greatest hope that we can become one with each of our mates." Jun said after several minutes. The silence was like none of the comfortable ones we had shared before. Instead, it was full of heartbreak and guilt, but more than that it held pity for our warlock.

"I hope for the same, I don't hold Shaw solely responsible for what happened to Killian. He was just the easiest to blame." I replied after what felt like eternity and it shocked me how much I believed my own words.