somebody to love (taekook)

Chapter 7

Jeongguk smelt the earthy fragrance of the lavender oil sitting in a tinted emerald jar on the dark oak side table. His fingers grasped around the bedsheets of Taehyung's bedroom, sitting up nervously as he looked around. The room had one wall acting as a shelf, filled with records.

Jeongguk looked at Taehyung, who wore the brown shirt and trousers, shirt rolled till his elbows, hair parted as usual. He was rummaging through the records to put on the right one, while Jeongguk just remained tense.

Something didn't feel right.

Jeongguk's legs were tightly pressed together, and he watched as Taehyung began playing Love Me Forever by Jodie Sands. Taehyung took out a cigar and lit the other end, and placed it between his lips while looking at Jeongguk.

"You look frightened, my love," Taehyung said lightly, and Jeongguk let out a nervous chuckle, looking down at the woven blanket he sat on.

"I-it just-" Jeongguk began and then gulped. He looked at Taehyung, who walked closer to him. "W-what are we doing?"

"Must you question your morality at a time like this?" Taehyung asked, and then brought Jeongguk's chin up to face him.

"We have wives," Jeongguk said, and Taehyung hummed, moving further to close the gap between them. "We're married, Taehyung. Rosie trusts me, a-and-"

Taehyung brought Jeongguk's thigh up with one hand until both were wrapped around Taehyung's waist, and he was lying on the bed. Taehyung looked down at him, smoking the cigar still. Jeongguk gulped. "It isn't fair for us to cause this distrust, to partake in these- these unlawful acts-" Jeongguk started, and then found Taehyung looking unbothered, in fact, amused.

"Doesn't these bother you in the slightest? Don't you love Veronica? Rosie told me the two of you eloped together, y-yet-" Jeongguk stammered, and then put his hands on his collar.

"Of course I love Veronica," Taehyung said, and Jeongguk gulped. "But it gets a little tiring, Jeongguk. To constantly be at wit's end with every responsibility, my home, my work, my wife, my- my principles. I just want to escape from it all, really."

"Why-why me? Why not a young woman, perhaps one who-who isn't-" Jeongguk began, and then gulped. "Who isn't a man?"

Taehyung chuckled. "I'm aware," Taehyung said, and then dipped down to kiss Jeongguk's neck, making the younger shiver. "I'm aware of our wrongdoings, of how much easier it would be for me to court a lady, yet-" Taehyung stopped, and looked into Jeongguk's brown eyes, how mystifying they were, how ambrosial. "Yet there's something about you-you, a man, that makes my desires towards men stronger." Taehyung finished, and then took his hands to the boy's hips.

"Your eye catches out for me, Jeongguk," Taehyung said upon Jeongguk's silence. "Your mind may send you false alarms, but understand that this is natural. From the olden times, men have loved men, women have loved women. I refuse to fight against what's natural, darling."

"But i-it's not natural, Taehyung." Jeongguk tried, eyes larger in fright. "You know what they say! It's like a disease, it's like a mental di-"

"Believe what you want to, Jeongguk. If your mind is made up on being against it, then I won't force myself and my morals upon you. It simply isn't my place." Taehyung said, sitting up. Jeongguk sat up as well, clutching Taehyung's shirt.

"You must understand where I come from, Taehyung," Jeongguk pleaded. "I've never thought of a man this way, never looked at a man this way, never wanted a man t-to-" Jeongguk began, and his breath hitched at his own words that were about to leave his lips. "N-never wanted a man to hold m-me down and-and make love to me. It's all so sudden, all so overwhelming! I don't know where this attraction has risen from, a-and I'm afraid it's not natural. It can't be. Two men like us wanting to be together- how are we any better than burglars?"