Winning her back

24. Let me down slowly

Lisa

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't expecting my father to be hostile. My actions went against everything he stands for, everything he thought us. I abandoned them to live a life I thought I wanted.

You could see the anger in his eyes when he asked me to leave, but it was more than anger. His eyes reflected pain, pain which I inflicted on him for a number of years. I guess I never thought about what life would be like for them, after I left. I never thought it would cause a drift between my parents, or cause Torvi's rebellious side to come out.

"Frank", my mom said for the millionth time. "We've already lost her once. I won't let it happen again".

My mother's words took me by surprise. I never believed she had the courage to stand up to my father. She was always the quiet once, the 'yes Frank' kind. She never sought conflict and escaped arguments as much as she could. Even if those arguments would eventually cause both of her daughters to flee.

"Why are you here? Haven't you caused us enough pain and embarrassment", my father questioned.

I couldn't help the small smile that crept on my face. He hadn't changed at all. Embarrassment? That's all he cared about, clearly. He always worried on what our community and neighbors perceived our family, especially members of the church. No doubt, me leaving was a scandal. I could imagine them whispering ear to ear about how the paster's perfect daughters left town and abandoned God. It must have harmed his ego, pride and probably his reputation too.

"You didn't leave me any other choice".

He scoffed and crossed his arms. He was still in the hallway standing up, to further emphasize how I wasn't welcome in his house.

"We gave you everything Lisa. A home, a good education, everything you ever wanted. And what did you do? Spit it right back in our face".

"Frank!"- my mother tried to intervene, but I cut her off.

"You gave me everything, everything except for the most important thing. Freedom".

"Is that why you're here then? Shouldn't you be in the city enjoying your so called freedom?".

I lowered by gaze and took a deep breath.

"Ben cheated on me with Torvi. I couldn't forgive him, and eventually we got a divorce". At least that's what I wanted to say. What I did say, was absolutely nothing.

The truth was, I was ashamed. Ashamed that I had nowhere else to go. Ashamed that life didn't work out the way I wanted to. And most of all, ashamed that I had to admit all this to the one person who shamed me in the first place.

I felt a tear escape, and then more ... and more till I started hyperventilating trying to catch my breath.

"Lisa baby calm down. Look at what you did Frank", my mother's words echoed.

"I ..", I began as I wiped a few tears. "Ben cheated on me", I admitted. "With Torvi".

I could see the colour drain from my father's face. He surely wasn't expecting the news, or me to be so bluntly honest. The room fell silent and I could hear a sob which escaped from my mother's mouth.

"There's more", I said.

My father glanced in my direction giving me the permission to continue, with a glint of hope in his eyes that there wasn't more to say.

"You might want to sit down for this".

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Thirty minutes had passed since I debriefed my father on the recent events. Thirty minutes of utter silence. For the first time in his life, he had nothing to say. No comment to pass, or words of wisdom as he liked to call it.

"Dad ... say something ... anything", I pleaded. His silence was torture, I expected to see a hint of emotion, maybe even hoped for it, but I got nothing in return.

He took a deep breath and glanced in my direction.
"You need to speak to your sister".

I straightened my back and furrowed my eyebrows. After everything I had just said, that's all he could tell me? I suspected he had a preference to one of his daughters, as did my mother, but to dismiss his least favorite daughter's struggles was shameful, even for him.

"That's all you have to say? Really?". My anger resurfaced once again.

"You know what", I said as I stood up. "This was a mistake. It was dumb of me to expect a different outcome. Clearly, you haven't changed".

"Lisa-," he began, but I wasn't about to let him get a word in.

"I thought four years would have caused you to become a little bit more remorseful. How wrong was I?". I reached for my coat and grabbed my suitcase.

"Lisa, if you'd just listen!", he roared as he met my eye level.

"For the record, you're a shit father and an even lousier paster".

"Torvi got knocked up", he screeched.

This time, it was my turn to stay silent.

"That's why we had an argument that night. That was why I kicked her out".

Suddenly, my head started spinning and dad was no longer in my sight. Instead, I had a very angled view of the ceiling. But all I could think about was the fact that my sister was pregnant when she slept with Ben.

She was pregnant and I didn't even know. Did Ben know? Multiple questions crowded my brain, but only one kept lingering in my mind.

Who was the father?

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Please don't kill me, I'm currently hiding under a rock 🙈

I know some of you might be confused by the ending of this chapter, HOWEVER, all will be explained in the following chapters.

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