Letter 4

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4th November 2015


My darling Zem,

I believe you know the proverb - a watched pot never boils. I have reasons to believe the same applies to mail too. Baby, I have my doubts that you are either not receiving my letters or being stubborn to reply.

God, please don't be mad, Zem. I know I did wrong but please, talk to me. Tell me that you hate me and that I should stop being a whiny little bitch. Say that you've read everything and don't want to talk to me and I won't bug you anymore.

Just tell me you are fine and I'll happily live on that assurance.

Zem, we have another mission tomorrow. I always write to you after completing my tasks because it gives me a sense of accomplishment. Today, my gorgeous, I write beforehand to seek a favor from you.

If something happens to me, darling, I want you to move on. Please don't go back into the darkness I saw in you when we first met.

I've never said this before but when we first met, I did not see a drunk woman in you. I saw a scared and depressed girl seeking help from alcohol to drown herself. My efforts to help you become sober were to ensure you don't take any drastic steps.

You did, though. Sneaking up and robbing my peace and my heart.

Zem, no matter what happens to me tomorrow, please know that you'll never have a lone moment in your life.

When you move on and get married, I'll be there. When your children grow up and go to college, get married and return with your grandkids, I'll be with you. Even when you turn old and cry about those grey hair, I'll love you like the first day I fell in love.

I know, I've made a lot of promises to you. But this isn't one of them.

This is my vow to you, my love.

Zemira, if these are my last words to you then I don't want to stop talking.

You've become my sun and the universe, darling. You're with me from dawn till dusk and every other moment. Zemira Ford, you've become a part of my soul and I can rest easy, knowing you're with me too.

You, my love, have saved me, healed me and taught me to love again. No matter where I'll find myself tomorrow, please know that I've found peace in letting you know my feelings. In knowing you love me wholeheartedly.

For eternities and beyond,

Yours and only yours,

Leo

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