This Time

Chapter Three

It had been three days, Mikasa spent most of the time sleeping. Mikasa woke back up around 6 p.m. Her face was stained with mascara and her eyes were puffy and red. She had awoken because she heard, Eren's mother come home.

Mikasa waited to get up until she heard the footsteps outside the door. It opened with a creak, and Carla stood at the door, she eyed Mikasa. Mikasa could feel the tears come up once again.

Carla made her way over to the bed, and sat down beside her, "Hey, how are you doing," she opened her arms for a hug.

Mikasa leaned into the hug, and waterfalls began to flow out of her eyes. Carla just held her close and stroked her hair. She had known Mikasa for years. She watched the young girl grow up, go through losing her father, and now she had lost her mother.

"I...feel..like it was my fault," Mikasa choked on her words, "if I would have called her, or asked her to get help, I....I..." she buried her face into Carla's shoulder.

I need to be strong Mikasa thought, she peeled herself from Carla, and crossed her arms.

"I'm going to make some supper ok," she grabbed Mikasa's hand, "You have us ok," she left the room.

She was alone with her thoughts.

Mikasa was always known to be resilient, she was always saving her friends from their troubles. But now she couldn't even save herself. How could've she failed that horribly.

"I wish you were here," she whispered, not to anyone in particular, but right now she just wanted anyone. Anyone to ease the pain. The world has always been too cruel for her, she didn't know if she could last much longer.

Ever since she was young, she had known the worlds' nature for cruel things.
She grew up with an ill father, he always knew he would die sooner than the others, she almost wonders why her parents brought her into this world if they knew that one day everyone she had cared for would leave her.

She vividly remembers noticing her father's illness for the first time. It was like any summer afternoon, the heat was unbearable so she and her father sat inside, eating popsicles, and he was reading her favorite book. They were in the middle of the book when her father had a coughing fit, he had these very often, but this time, after he was done, a drop of blood trailed from his mouth down his neck.

"Papa, your bleeding," she looked at him with large eyes.

"It's ok dear, please hand me the napkin," he wanted her to forget.

Her father never was vocal about being sick, but she could see it.
Especially in the last months, his body went grey and frail. His soft brown eyes held no more warmth, he was unable to tell stories without a coughing fit. He would only eat, when she was there, he had given up.

She also remembers the day he told her goodbye.

She was sitting holding his hand in the hospital room, the tv was replaying old movies. She had been telling him all about her week at school. She complained about her homework and having to save Eren from getting himself beaten up again.

"Papa, once you get better, I want to show you the tree I found ok," she knew deep down he would never get better.

Her father looked at her like he was about to say something, but he stopped short, that's when the alarms went off.

Mikasa remembers being ushered out of the room she was told to sit in the waiting room.

Eren was waiting there for her, he saw her and she remembers being able to smile at him.

"Mikasa, hey wanna come to pick some flowers from the back with me," he looked at her.

"Eren," she gulped, "I think my fathers... dead", she allowed the tears that clouded her vision to fall.