Miscellanea

Metanoia

Metanoia (noun)

= a transforming change; turning from darkness and facing the light

How long
I do not know
How long was I in the dark?
How long did I sit and wait, watching the world pass me by.
Wrapping myself in a blanket of shadows
Sitting in the midst of a puddle in an alley
An alley between two buildings
One called Fear and the other called Myself.
Myself collapsed and has been leaning on Fear
for too long, far too long.
The sun is blocked from view, the sky, the clouds
Blocked by Myself.
For so very long I waited,
waited for someone to come along.
And then I realised
I was someone.
I realised that an alley has 3 walls, not 2.
I stand from where
I had lay with vacant eyes on the wall.
On Fear.
I had thought it was Fear who kept me here.
I stand and see the 3rd wall
Stumble towards it, drag my feet
I lean against it,
I am weary from waiting
The wall is named Hope, I find.

Hello, hope. Where have you been all this time?

Hello, you. I've been here all along waiting for you
to come along.

I've come now, I'm here

Let me tell you a secret, little one...Fear is crumbling

Fear? Fear can't be crumbling...Fear is immortal!

Ah, but the weight of Myself has fear all tired out, you see.
I've been crumbling some, too...

But how? Nothings leaning on you!?

Neglect has, little one. I've been here all this time, and
you have too but never saw. I have something more to tell you, and something to give you.

What is it, Hope?

These two walls- Fear and Myself, they are holding you back. They are chaining you down. Keeping you from living. But here. Take one of these bricks on the ground, one of the few that's fallen.

A crumbling brick from the wall of Hope

Thank you

I pick one up and run my thumb over its smoothness.

Smile at Hope who was there all along, Turn
to face the world. Hope in my pockets, my head
and my heart.

I walk down the length of the alley, step over old bricks that loosened and fell from Myself.

I'll replace the bricks, put in better ones, stronger ones.

I'll tear down Fear and put up a new wall.

Hope gave me a piece of herself, I feel it's weight in my pocket as I step

Out into the sunlight

I'll put up a new wall

I'll put up a new wall and call it Faith