Learning To Breathe

10

"Jasper!" I brought Jasper to the dog park, thinking that the fresh air might make me feel better, but now I want to go home and Jasper is nowhere to be found. 
"Jasper buddy, let's go!" I call once more. I wait a few more minutes and still no Jasper. I begin to get worried. I look around a bit more when I finally see him, sitting under a maple tree with his favourite toy. I begin to run toward Jasper to grab him before he can get away but then I feel a hand on my shoulder. I whip my head around to see a person, they have Morgan's height and build but the face is blank like it's been wiped away. Suddenly, the ground beneath me crumbles and I fall, reaching my hand out to the person but they just stand there, staring at me as I fall-

I wake in a panic from my dream, shaking and sweating, just playing it over in my head.  The clock on my dresser reads 1:02 a.m.

 "Ugh," I say as I grab an extra pillow and bring it close to me. If this pillow had to breathe it wouldn't be able to with my death grip on it. I try to go back to sleep, but after trying for a while, I give up and decide to go make tea.

While sitting at my kitchen island I decide to text Morgan, he's probably still awake, he doesn't usually go to bed until 2 in the morning. 

Hey, you up? <sent @ 1:32 a.m>

Yeah, what's up? <received @ 1:34 a.m>

oh nothing, I just couldn't sleep <sent @ 1:34 a.m>

Ah, I see. <received @ 1:34 a.m>

Want me to come over? <received @ 1:35 a.m>

If you wouldn't mind, that'd be great. Bring your pyjamas! <sent @ 1:35 a.m>

Soon enough Morgan arrives at my door, it's so quiet in the building, he doesn't even knock, I can hear his footsteps as he approaches my door, I check the peephole in the door before I open it. Morgan sees me and pulls me into one of his bear hugs. They always comfort me.

"Do you want a cup of tea?" I ask as I grab my cup from the island.
"No thank you, baby girl, I think one of us should go to bed because they have to work in the morning."
"Hmm," I pretend to not know what he's talking about. "Who has to work?"
"You do! You silly goose. Now off to bed."
"Fine. But only if someone comes with me."
"Alright. Jasper," Jasper lazily lifts his ear but doesn't move off of his bed. "You're up buddy."
"Oh, he's not coming, will you?" but I'm not really asking. Morgan knew as soon as I texted him that I wanted him to come over to lay in my bed with me so I wasn't alone.

I went to lay in bed while Morgan shut off all the lights, except for the one above the kitchen sink. Then he climbs in bed next to me and pulls me close. 

"Thank you." That is the last thing I say before falling asleep.

*****

In the morning I wake to the smell of bacon. I throw on a bathrobe over my clothes before going to my kitchen. I see Morgan at the stove, shirtless but wearing his flannel PJ pants.

"Good morning handsome."
"Oh! Hey, baby girl, I was just about to wake you."
"The smell of bacon did that." 
"Would you like some tea?"
"I can make my own."
"Oh, nonsense. I've got it, you sit."
"You're already making breakfast. I can make my own tea, do you want coffee?"
"Ugh. I guess if I can't convince you to sit."

We move around my small kitchen in harmony, there's no bumping into each other or crowding it's just, effortless.

I make my tea and Morgans coffee and sit down at the island.

"I have a doctor's appointment after work today."
"Oh, do you need me to take you?" Morgan says as he puts a plate of food in front of me. 
"No, it's okay. I convinced Chris to go."
"You had to convince him? It's his baby too, he should want to go to your appointments."
"I know, but he went to the last one so he just didn't see the point in going to this one too."
"Do you hear yourself? That's ridiculous."
I just shot Morgan an I-don't-want-to-talk-about-it-anymore-look and he dropped the subject, moving onto work.

"I don't start until noon but I could go with you if you want, I know you get nervous when you have to go into the building by yourself."
"Uh, I think I'll be okay, if I need you I'll call."
"Promise?"
"Promise."

I finish up my breakfast before heading to my room to get dressed. I say bye to mom, pat Jasper on the head and give Morgan a kiss on the cheek before heading off to work.

"9-1-1 what is the nature of your emergency?"
"um."
"Hello? Are you there?"
"Y-yes, but I have to be quiet."
"Okay, I'll whisper too, is there someone in the room threatening you?"
"Yes, my boyfriend."
"Okay honey. You're going to be okay. Can you tell me your name?"
"Amanda."
"Okay, Amanda. And what is your address?"
"6745 KandleWecker lane."
"Okay, and what seems to be the problem?"
"It's my boyfriend, he's gone completely crazy."
"Okay, and what is he doing?"
"He's pacing in the living room, I told him that I want to break up and now he's threatening to kill us both."
"Okay. Where are you, Amanda?"
"I'm under the coffee table."
"Does your boyfriend have a weapon?"
"Yes. He has a knife."
"Okay, I need you to keep an eye on that knife and move if it gets close to you."
"Okay, I can do that."
"The police are 2 minutes away. You're doing great."
"You called the police? you stupid bitch! What the fuck is wrong with you! Are you scared? you a scared little baby, you had to tell on me!"

"I had to do something! I'm not just going to let you scare the shit out of me in my own home!"
*door slams open*

"Amanda?"
"Amanda is that the police?"
"Yes. Thank you!"
"Just doing my job, bye now."
"Bye."

*****