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Jeonga wasn't too sure it was healthy just how fast her heart was beating. No - she knew it wasn't. There was no way it could be at all.
She was terrified, in all honesty, of continuing to work that day, but she knew she had no choice but to go along with it. She didn't want to get fired - Jeonga couldn't get fired - or else there would be no way she could ever work at BigHit, whether it was as a producer or something else.
There was obviously going to be doubt in her mind that Namjoon was going to keep her secret. But out of all members in the group, he was perhaps the one who she was actually glad he had found out.
It was no secret he was smart, and this made their producing sessions a whole lot easier. Jeonga did, to a certain extent, trust him to keep the secret.
She could have lied about it - but he had caught her red handed. It was really such a set of coincidences; Namjoon just so happened to be the one who had walked in on her and Yoongi's long hours of making music the previous day, and he had been the one to be in the elevator when she hurried in and managed to rip out her headphone in the process so that he heard that very song he had walked in on.
There was absolutely no way for her to get out of that.
"You look tired." The head makeup artist had taken one look at her end sent her in Yoongi's direction - it was the same woman from the first photoshoot she had worked with Minhee, and she seemed to remember the conversations she had had with him. And now, Yoongi was smiling up at her.
"You look just as tired as I do." Her reply came natural, even though she could feel her nerves stronger than anything else. It had put her on edge.
"But I've got makeup to cover it up." He replied with ease, gesturing to the makeup brush in her hand. It shook a little in the reflection and Yoongi stared at it. "Did you get something to eat at all?"
Jeonga paused, mind running through the events that had already happened since she was woken up by the phone call from her supervisor. It had been busy and constantly quick-paced. "Can't remember." She shrugged. "I woke up late and had to rush here."
"Ah, I wish I could sleep in late." Yoongi sighed wistfully, his eyes still on the makeup artist's movements in the large mirror. It seemed strange, her actions so much more jerky and hesitant - nothing like how she had been the very first time they had met. How could she have been so confident then and now was nothing at all like it; if anything to should be vice versa. "Are you sure you're all right? There's nothing else wrong except lack of sleep? Do you have something to eat? Snacks or something?"
"Yeah.. I've got some in my bag." Jeonga swallowed, trying to make herself seem more like herself. But it seemed impossible and her eyes darted across the room to where Namjoon was sat. It hit her like a truck, the reality of it all. "I just.. I'm gonna go to the bathroom."
Yoongi sat up as she fled the room, just as Minhee entered. The other intern looked just as shocked as he was.
And just as the idol was asking Minhee if she knew what was wrong, Jeonga pushed open the door to the nearest bathrooms, choosing the closest open stall and locking the door behind her, sitting on the seat.
Her elbows balanced on her knees, head resting in her palms, Jeonga took several long deep breaths in. In her panic to get from the elevator to the work she hadn't quite taken it in, hadn't quite figured what Namjoon knowing really meant for her.
For years - since 2013 - she had kept her identity a secret. She had never told anyone in her personal life of her true profession and success; they thought she was an over-glorified secretary in a law firm who got multiple bonuses a year that went towards treating her mother and father. None of her friends, none of her family, none of her friends knew that she was ECHO.
After all of her hard work, after all of the attempts to hide herself and throw people off of the scent, one little mistake had thrown her entire online anonymous persona. Not one single person had known anything.
But now Namjoon did. And that thought was terrifying.
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