boneless me is slithering

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i am missing a lot of bones
my body's over bending now
without them i can't fold
or turn away from stares that
whisper to themselves how
ugly i appear, i can't take this

there's way too much fat on
my belly and i look therefore
reverse hourglass, boys are
disappointed with me but not
as much as visual screen girls,
oh what i'd do to be them!

but i am mushy, extra sensitive
thanks to all the years of prepping
i've devoured so much remark
and still my arms and thighs and
stomach are disproportionate to
each other, i can't take this anymore

hide the mirrors, i would probably not fit in one, when i do nobody
else will be there to see, the old absurd me . . .

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