Nobody Else

Sylvie stood at the table at Molly's making her best effort to convince everyone around her that she was enjoying herself. Most of Firehouse 51 was at Molly's celebrating Mouch's Firefighter's Award of Valor and while she was so incredibly happy for and proud of Mouch, her mind was elsewhere. How could she possibly concentrate when Matt Casey was standing right beside her? She was overly aware of his presence even when she was trying to listen to what everyone else was saying and laugh at the right moments.

"Are you ever gonna take that medal off?!" Herrman jokingly asked Mouch.

"Not tonight. Maybe not ever." Mouch said with such an endearing look of pride and happiness.

As much as Sylvie wanted to sit and enjoy this moment for her longtime friend, all she could think of right now was how good Matt smelled. He was never one to wear any strong colognes. He just smelled clean, like he was fresh from a shower. Picturing Matt in the shower brought on a whole new wave of anxiety and hurt for Sylvie and she tried to push all of those thoughts out of her mind. The last thing she needed to do was allow herself to entertain any fantasies about him.

Matt had gotten a call from Gabby last shift and it had reminded Sylvie of why she could never have Matt in her life as more than a friend. He was still in love with his ex-wife and while Sylvie had slowly fallen more in love with him over the last couple of years, she had gotten used to trying to hide those feelings. She knew she couldn't settle for being second in someone's life and she certainly couldn't have a casual sexual relationship with Matt. He meant too much to her and she was too old for flings. She tried to make it work with Greg, but he saw right through her and ended things. She couldn't blame him; he also didn't deserve to be second in someone's life. Sylvie was starting to feel a slight buzz from her drink and wondered to herself if being a "crazy cat lady" was better. Veronicat wasn't so bad, was she?

Why was he standing so close to her? She tried to act casual but his mere presence was becoming more than she could handle tonight. As she tried to bring herself back to reality, she heard Matt tell everyone, "Next drinks are on me!"

Sylvie raised her eyebrows and faked a smile. This was it for her. Not only could she not stand to be near Matt anymore, but she couldn't risk getting tipsier and saying- or doing- more than she wanted to. She glanced his way as he walked to the bar and made her decision. She was going to sneak out of Molly's and drown her sorrows in some rosé and sappy music.

After hugging Mouch and congratulating him one more time, she began walking out of Molly's as she put her pink leather jacket on. She tried to hurry so Matt didn't catch her leaving. Was it the alcohol, or did she catch him glancing at her as she walked out? He confused Sylvie more than any man ever had, but she kept walking and started wondering which sad song she would play as soon as she got home. After a few steps outside in the clear and quiet Chicago night, Sylvie heard the door open behind her.

"Sylvie..."

She turned around at the familiar husky voice. She figured Matt was wondering why she left when he was ordering everyone new drinks.

"Sorry, I'm wiped from the day. Just gonna go home and crash." She explained to him with a tired smile.

"Okay." He stated plainly. She began to turn around when he continued, "But I need you to know. After the ceremony, Gabby and I had a.... great conversation."

Sylvie could only imagine why he was telling her this. Did he not realize how much it broke her heart every single time she thought about their brief but explosive kiss that night all those months ago? The last thing she wanted to do was stay and listen to him tell her about his "great" conversation with his ex-wife. Did he not realize that any time he was within five feet of her, she imagined his arms around her and his warm hands all over her body? She needed this conversation to end quickly.

"I'm happy for you, Matt. I really am." She hoped her smile seemed genuine, but she felt the familiar lump in her throat and burning behind her eyes. If she didn't leave soon, her emotions were going to give her away. She tried to turn around once again, but Matt stopped her.

"No... no no no, that's not what I meant." He said, seeming frustrated and maybe a bit flustered. Sylvie took a deep breath as he continued. "The conversation was great because it just made clear what I... I already knew. Gabby and I will always care about each other; there's too much history not to."

Sylvie nodded and smiled. She was going back and forth between feeling frustrated with Matt for telling her this and just flat out tired. She had been hiding her feelings for so long and it was exhausting. Why he felt the need to remind her of this was beyond her.

"But... I'm not in love with her. I haven't been in a long time." Matt said.

Wait, what? Sylvie's mind was racing. Did he really just say he wasn't in love with Gabby? How much had she had to drink before she left? Surely she was imagining this.

"Gabby... is my past. And you?" Matt paused. Sylvie's heart was racing. What was happening? This beautiful man who she had worked next to and admired for so long was looking her right in the eyes and saying he was no longer in love with his ex-wife.

"I'm in love with you, Sylvie. Nobody else." Matt said as he fought back tears. The world seemed to stand still. Sylvie no longer heard any of the usual Chicago city noises; she could only hear her own heartbeat like a loud drum in her ears. In a strange moment where time seemed to stop, Sylvie remembered reading about people's knees being weak in romantic books. She had always assumed writers wrote about that for dramatic effect. But standing here right now in front of Matt who she loved with everything she had, Sylvie's knees felt weak at the declaration he had just made. She was acutely aware of the blood rushing through her body and felt her cheeks heat up. Did he really just tell her he was in love with her?

"Even if that doesn't change anything for you," Matt continued. "I needed you to know it."

Sylvie knew she should say something. Anything. But she couldn't manage to find any words. She couldn't wrap her mind around what Matt had just said. She had dreamed about this for years but just knew it would never happen. Part of her wanted to jump into his arms and kiss him right then and there. But the other part of her wondered if any of this was real.

Matt started to back away. Sylvie fought the urge to reach out and stop him. After a few steps, he looked at her and gave the smallest smile that melted Sylvie's heart and excited her all at once. He turned around and walked back into Molly's as she stood still. She had expected Matt to keep telling her that he and Gabby would be reuniting. Instead, she heard the words that she thought could only exist in fairytales. She knew in her heart that the ball was in her court now; she knew exactly what she needed to do.