poems

am i alive

Am i alive - Chantell Field

the pain is so painful i can hardly explain

my chest heaves as my lungs try to grasp the sharp air around me

i’m not myself anymore

i want to be myself again

not yet has the thought of leaving

and seeing what the end looks like crossed my mind

but the want for the blood to show that i’m alive is

am i alive 

am i breathing

am i alive

my knees quake 

my wrists shake

i can’t cry anymore

have i cried to much

or have i not cried enough

am i alive

my friends care i know they do

but the thought of them looking at me differently

pulls me apart

layer by layer

until there is nothing but pain left

am i alive

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im sorry if this is really bad

-Chantell xx