The Lost Documents of Julianne V. Skye

May 30th, 16:23, United in Disdain

May 30th, 16:23, Travel Log of Aidan Rode
The idiot brigade has come to town, and I mourn their arrival as the demise of decency. It seems the Arceist Knights of Purity grew tired of Nimbasa and decided to take a vacation by the bay. They've set up a stand to hand out pamphlets, lecture through a megaphone, and accost pedestrians with surprise propaganda. I noticed whilst walking to the marina. Though it felt like shaking hands with Ghetsis, I took one of those crappy fliers just to see what they were up to. Apparently, the AKP are staging a witch hunt. Below are contents...

HOW HUMAN ARE YOUR NEIGHBORS? — BEWARE THE MENACE HIDDEN IN PLAIN SIGHT!

Dangerous pokemon are deceiving you in your own neighborhood!

Undella Town is a HOTSPOT for malicious pokemon activity. Ghostly POSSESSION, psychic MIND-CONTROL, and pokemon IMPERSONATING humans have become an epidemic. These monsters may look like us, but they don't play by our rules.

They are here to hurt us, seduce us, harm our children, and exploit our society!

Possessed/controlled individuals and disguised pokemon are known to commit VIOLENT and SEXUAL acts against humans and other innocent species. Some of them are infiltrating the government and corporate sector to SPY on us, STEAL from us, and DESTROY our civilization!

What can YOU do to purify the world of these abominations?

1. Spread AWARENESS through word-of-mouth and social media.
2. IDENTIFY which dangerous species exist in your community.
3. LEARN and OBSERVE the warning signs of possession, mind-control, and human impersonation.
4. REPORT any and all suspicious individuals and activities.
5. ELIMINATE dangerous pokemon from your area.
6. JOIN our cause to protect humanity and pure pokemon everywhere!

—Get smart! Here's a start!—
These native and invasive species are all potential perpetrators of possession, mind-control, and human impersonation.
- Baltoy and Claydol
- Ditto
- Drifloon and Drifblim
- Elgyem and Beheeyem
- Frillish and Jellicent
- Golett and Golurk
- Litwick, Lampent, and Chandelure
- Lunatone
- Munna and Musharna
- Ninetales
- Shuppet and Banette
- Solosis, Duosion, and Reuniclus
- Solrock
- Yamask and Cofagrius
- Zorua and Zoroark

For more information on red flags, personal anecdotes, and the Arceist Knights of Purity, take our HUMANITY? brochure or talk to an AKP representative.

Needless to say, I did not take their brochure nor did I stick around to chat. The AKP has definitely gotten smarter since the university scandal. A few members here and there still get caught committing crimes or posting lunacy online. However, the church as a whole has changed their approach to appeal to broader audiences. As such, their tactics have become infinitely more subtle (and scummy). This flier is a prime example.

Many of the points they made are genuine public safety issues. People should be made more aware of the threats posed by pokemon like beheeyem, congragrius, jellicent, and chandelure. The government should also continue improving measures to protect us from attacks. Nonviolent examples of these species are the exception, not the rule. Furthermore, they are known to deliberately seek conflict with humans. Many interactions are fatal. Survivors are often traumatized.

As usual, the AKP has mixed the truth with a bucketload of tepigshit. Half of the pokemon on their list aren't even capable of committing the acts they've been accused of. Most species that are capable generally do so in self-defense or for other unmalicious purposes. This rhetoric is a ploy to incite panic and turn the public against innocent creatures like golurk, musharna, and zoroark. It's unsurprising such rubbish would emerge from the bowels of that twisted, fear-mongering cult. Screw them and their caps-lock fetish.