Cold night.
Lonely streets.
Lonely room.
Flashbacks of memories with him.
I miss him so much. But what can I do? He gave up on us. He promised that we'll be together until the end. I hold on to that promise up until now. I'm hoping that one day he'll show up at my door asking if we can be together again.
I remember how he comforted me when I'm having a hard time with my family and my studies.
Maibabalik pa ba? Sana.
My heart died the same time he walked out of my apartment door. Right now I still don't know how I survived 5 years of not having him beside me.
"Camille let's go to the office na malapit na mag 8 baka ma late na naman tayo." sabi ni Zara sa akin. My only bestfriend since time immemorial.
Tumango ako at sumabay na sa paglalakad papuntang elevator. I've been working with this company for 6 years already and every corner of the building I remember him. How he smile at me every time we met at the hallway.
I wanted to resign pero di ko kaya kasi ito lang yung pinagkukunan ko ng pera para pang supporta sa pamilya. I just cannot leave this work dahil lang sa naaalala ko siya sa bawat sulok ng building na ito. I have to be strong kahit nadudurog ang puso ko tuwing naaalala ko siya.
I wanted to move on. I wanted to bury all those memories that we had together. I wanted to be my old self again kung saan walang dinadalang mabigat na bagay sa aking puso. At kung saan hindi ako naiiyak sa tuwing naaalala ko siya.
I felt safe everytime na kasama ko siya. Siya ang naging pangalwang tahanan ko sa loob ng ilang taon. He's the one who inspired me to reach for my dream kahit na gustong gusto ko nang mag give up. He's the one who encouraged me to continue my studies.
He gave color to my dull world. He brought joy to my melancholic life.
Pero siya rin ang bumawi sa lahat ng yun. I wondered if di kaya siya pinadala sa Singapore para asikasohin ang isang proyekto ng kompanya dun at di niya nakasama ang babaeng yun, kami pa kaya hanggang ngayon?
Siguro?
Saan ba ako nag kulang?
May problema ba sakin?
Sa ilang taon naming pagsasama na bored ba siya?
I think it's time to move on from him. But how can I move on when I remember all those memories, ALL TOO WELL?
