Queen of the Dragons

42

"I miss Juni so much," I sighed as Dale handed me two flowers. Dale and I had been foraging for berries and on the hunt for a beautiful meadow that one of the castle guards told us about the other day. We had filled two baskets up of ruet berries and other berries that seemed very familiar to ruet berries but when I tried to eat it, Dale slapped them out of my hand. Claiming I could not eat them because they were not ripe yet. Sometimes I enjoy bitter fruits and he knows this but I do not get between Dale and his plants, that is a sure way to upset him. Now we were resting...

"What did you say, Estelle?" He questioned aloud as I frowned at my eldest friend. He was not paying me any attention. I was very, extremely sad and I did not know what to do with myself and I could not tell Dale these things. The things I worried about I would have to tell a sister, not a Dale.

I sighed, lying down in the grass. "Dale, I am very stressed out right now and you are having fun with your flower crown and not helping me."

He was making a crown of flowers out of the flowers that General Iona was wearing that one day. I am sure he is making the crown for her. I wanted to tell him that maybe she does not like these flowers but she may like it from him. I will be silent on my knowledge.

I felt my friend lay down next to me. "Why are you stressed out? Your husband loves you and you love him, yes? You are to become Queen in a few days. That should make one happy."

Yes. He was right, but he was also very wrong. Loche loves me, and I love him but I am not sure I can trust him. I have lied to him many times and I do not know if he has lied to me or if it is true what those men have told me. I also am not sure if I will receive my wings in time for this...very different pyrexaa thing I am not sure I will like. The women in robes claimed they would be finding women for Loche to....be with because I am weak.

Loche and I have never been forbidden, so what if they are right? What if I am not able to handle all of Loche or Gaul? Loche claims he will never touch another woman but how can I trust him? I am just very nervous about everything and I do not know who to talk to about this. The Caticala women have been making me try on a very large amount of dresses and have been keeping me busy with the Coronation preparations. Loche has not been paying much attention to me. He has been stuck in his study and going other places and well I am glad for that? I am not sure.

He still has been sleeping with me of course and we speak but I know he is angry with me for some reason. I am not sure why though. I have been acting like a very good wife.

I give him kisses on the cheek and the lips. They are not very long and drawn out like the kisses that make my toes curl and heart flutter like before. But it is enough to make him happy, or so I have thought. I let him hold me while we sleep, even if I begin to sweat from his intense heat I still allow him hold me. So why is he acting different?

"Marriage is not easy," I told my friend quietly as I paused my gazing at the sky and propped myself up on my elbow, to stare at my friend. Dale was staring at me in suspicion. Why was my friend starting at me like this? As if I have done something terrible? Which I have not. Well I have, betraying my husband is terrible but I have done nothing to Dale!

He positioned himself so that he was on his side to, being held up by his elbow. "Estelle has he hurt you? Why is marriage hard for a man and woman whom both love one another?" He questioned me while frowning.

Well because other people say things! "Well...lies make a marriage full of love, hard. Lies make any and everything hard!" I cried out in dismay as my friend looked away from me as if he was hiding something.

"Dale? What is wrong?" I questioned as he grabbed my hand and splayed it against his palm. I laughed. Dale's hand was much different from Loches. My husbands hand were about twice the size of Dale's. We used to do this as children, press our palms together but we were not children anymore.