"Finally," he sighs, lips quirking, and he still doesn't look happy— far from it, but his eyes are not vacant anymore and the mist is not as suffocating as before.
"Uh— I shouldn't—"
"Please," he takes a hold of my wrist, and even though my body's not as solid as his, the touch feels overwhelmingly real and it makes you shiver pleasantly.
His stare is more intense than ever, and it's enough to keep you from disappearing again. Taehyung's fingers are gentle on your skin as they let go of their grasp, touching slightly before letting you go.
You can only look at each other for a while— even though he's the one that should be freaking out, you can feel yourself trembling slightly as you try to keep your emotions in check, not knowing how to react as his eyes bore onto your face in a way you could only dream about for the past few months. I flinch when he lifts one of his hands, and my eyes widen when he takes it as a bad sign, eyes filling with guilt as he retracts his arm.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to— oh, okay."
I have to avoid his gaze, unable to handle the heavy flow of emotions as my hand grabs his own tightly. His fingers are long and soft and it can't compare to your limited imagination— you have to ask yourself if it's possible for something as simple as this to feel so right, even when it's not meant to be, even when he's alive and you're not.
Taehyung grasps my hand just as firmly, and i notice the glint of a smile from the corner of your eye. "Thank you. Please— don't go so fast this time."
I nod timidly, eyes focused on the beautiful golden tone of his hand holding yours as if his life depended on it. i look back at him whenever to feel slightly prepared, but his wide eyes on your face still manage to startle you, and it takes you some effort to bury the shyness that's trying to overcome your body.
"Does it hurt?" i ask, and i want to hit myself the moment the words leave your mouth. Of course it does. Taehyung chuckles dryly, stopping himself when the smile stretching his mouth makes the wound on his lip open again.
"It's okay, I'm used to this— but you probably know that already"
Id hate to agree with him, because it couldn't be closer to the truth. But many times you've helped him cool down so he doesn't end up in a bloody fight— and the reminder that you might have avoided it tonight is still pulsing and vivid at the front of your mind. The guilt is strong and heavy on your shoulders and it makes you look down at your intertwined fingers, eyes focusing on the calming way his thumb caresses up and down your almost translucent skin.
"Hey," he mutters soothingly, tugging at your hand gently. "Come here, sit next to me."
I join him on the bench, trying not to smile at the way he still hasn't let go of your hand. You can feel his arm against yours, brushing slightly and sending tickles under your skin, light and refreshing, and you have to contain yourself from sliding closer. You look at his profile instead, at the tiny scratches on his skin and the pursed lips, at the way he's trying not to show any more bleakness now that you're by his side.
"Tell me what happened," i say after a few quiet moments, and Taehyung blinks, looking at you confusedly.
"You weren't there?"
I flush in embarrassment this time, looking ahead as i feel his burning gaze on my face. "I just... I wanted to give you some space—"
He snorts at that, and you can feel the way his shoulder shakes slightly in a quiet laugh. "So that's why I couldn't hold myself back," he sighs again, sounding more tired than ever as he blinks at the sky. "The girl... she just wanted me to get some alcohol for her and her friends."
I immediately know what he means by get, and it makes you tense up, holding your breath as you wait for him to continue.
"I refused, I wasn't in the mood for that— then her boyfriend came up and insisted some more. He got on my nerves, we fought— but it was too many people against me," he laughs, a humorless sound that's just as murky as the dry night. "Even my best friend turned his back to me. That— that was..." his voice seems to fall flat, unable to continue as the words get stuck on his throat.
OMG HIII ! check out the first chapter of my new book philopobia
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