Already Gone

Chapter 18: We Could Stay Here

Off in the woods, a few hundred yards or so from the outskirts of the trees, was humanities strongest soldier. Forced to live even if it was death that he craved, wounds slashed across his eyes and blood stained over his clothes. Under the canopy of trees this seemed like a peaceful end, a moment to escape the insanity of the world that laid outside.

Niema trekked back toward Levi, gun in hand as she finished off the last few recruits that had come looking for the two of them. It was odd to walk on foot through the place where she had soared, excitement and the slightest bit of terror as titans roamed the floors. Now it was just a forest, the fear she felt no longer came from inside the trees, but from the humans lurking outside of it.

"I'm back," Niema announces as her feet plant down next to Levi, half expecting a 'tch' in response, but even he was rendered silent. "That should be the last of them."

It seemed like a life time spent together, however as she took a seat next to his corpse looking body it was as if this was her first time meeting him. Slouching slightly, Niema took the edge of her shirt and wiped the bit of blood that seeped from his mouth. 

"Everyone else got turned in to titans but only you survived...That crazy Ackerman blood of yours just won't let you die huh?"

Niema felt herself relax slightly as she spoke, although the conversation was heavily one sided, she didn't mind all that much. "Not that I'm complaining, I hate to say it but I'm glad your alive."

She leans back, hands digging in to the dirt. "I just don't know what to do now," Niema admits as she starts to tug at the grass between her thumb and index finger.

It was quiet, only the sound of a few birds chirping filled the silence between the two. Feeling horribly alone—the guilt of her actions weighing up on her, Niema turned toward the unconscious man and continued to speak; The more she talked the less she had to listen to her thoughts.

"I don't know what happened to Hange, which is completely my fault. The scouts are practically disbanded, also my fault. And now you're on deaths door..." She eyes Levi, the corners of her mouth twitched. "...Maybe that's your fault, but still."

Levi was still silent, chest rising and falling in uneven patterns as he continued to sleep.

"Plus the Jaegerists have probably taken over by now, which means that if we marched our sorry asses back there we'd probably get locked up in a cell."

Niema glanced down at Levi, relieved that he still had his eyes closed and chest heaving. She was almost grateful that he was fast asleep, for as long as she knew him she had never once saw Levi rest. Sleeping, relaxation, these were things that never came first in anyone's lives on Paradis.

"We could just stay here." She utters quietly, feeling guilty for even suggesting such a self indulgent thing.
"Live out our days in the woods..."

Niema was not an emotional person, she was capable of separating herself from anyone and everything. Which meant that the word family meant nothing to Niema; Her parents were lone gone, and the thought of having a wedding or children had never once crossed her mind.

For a long time Niema had told herself that when the Titans were finally eradicated she would find some rest, maybe start to think about those selfish things like sleep, love, gluttony. However, when the Titans were gone a new enemy had arrived on their doorstep, and that feeling of peace was wandered out of her grasp yet again. It became a habit now to shove any feelings of content deep down in fear of getting too comfortable, but as she sat next to Levi she swore she felt it for just a moment: Peace.

"You and I, we can never seem to stay out of the action but, maybe this time we will."

For a moment she tricks herself in to believing it was a possibility. Letting the feeling of content start to fill up the cracks of her soul from all of the fear and self loathing she had done.