Fly Me to the Moon

Gone by Dawn

Night passes and morning comes, and I still lay there in Cheol's arms. A sense of guilt rushes over me, not only has a pushed Mingyu away. But there I was again, giving Seungcheol false hopes. There was never anytime for him to heal, because there I was all the time; A reminder of everything we used to be.

There was a time where I would do anything for Cheol, but for him there was never a time he wouldn't do anything for me. He was always ready and willing to go on any adventure, to break any rule, just to appease me. Sometimes I regretted not being able to feel the same for him anymore. At some point, the line of loyalty was crossed and it became more toxic than anything else.

I couldn't wake up in Seungcheol's arms because he would mistake it as a second chance. He would consider it more than it was, which was nothing. It was just me escaping loneliness once again. I had to remind myself of the events that lead to our demise.

It was a Sunday evening, the day of worship they said. It was more like a day of judgement, a day to bring shame among us, for they didn't believe in our kind of love. The kind of love that over looks barrier and gender "norms", the kind that only looks into the soul.

Again they had found yet another pair doing "unmentionable" things to each other; Which was quite funny, taking into consideration the many times Cheol and I had taken it way further.

I remember sitting in the packed chapel, and shutting everything out. Fidgeting with my fingers to keep my eyes from slipping shut. Cheol's hands inch closer to mines, catching my fingers with his and holding on tight. As I catch a glimpse of his smile, so does the headmaster.

The room goes silent as he makes his way towards us. He ignores me, yet keep his eyes focused only on a brave Seungcheol. The headmaster leans in close enough to Cheol's ears so that only he can hear the words that come out of his mouth.

Many times we had been afraid, in trouble, or worried; But the look on Seungcheol's face was unmatched, an expression I had never seen. And in all the months I had spend with him, fear was not an emotion he had ever showed.