She vividly remembers every little detail of that moment, as if it were only yesterday when...
.
.
.
Bella was living a borrowed life. The life with nothing in it but the pain of the reminder that she, in fact, was alone. When she woke up in the hos...
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Bella vividly remembers every little detail of that moment, as if it were only yesterday when...when her parents had left her alone in this world.
She refused to believe they were dead. How could she?
When she could so clearly remember the way sun shone through her mother's hair when they played tag on the beach, or maybe how her father's eyes would crinkle at the smallest of her achievements, how they held onto her hand and whispered goodbye when they drove their car that afternoon, the day she last saw them, when everything was normal in the world— when everything was normal in her world— how could she believe they were dead now?
Even when their butler picked up the phone call and stared at her in sympathy with an ashen face, she refused to believe they were dead. But the world was hell-bent on reminding her every second of the day that she was alive, and they apparently, were not. It was as if the safety plug was pulled off the bomb that was her life and now it burned with no water in sight.
Bella was living a borrowed life. The life with nothing in it but the pain of the reminder that she, in fact, was alone. But not if she joined her parents, right?
'No more pain', she thought.
Just as she sliced open her left wrist and her already hooded eyes gave up on her, there was a loud bang and then the rock hit the bed.
------~X~------
When she woke up in the hospital, the first thought that came to her mind was that she had failed, again. She could not fathom a single thing that she might have done after that unfortunate day of the demise of her parents, no, not a single thing fell into place after that.
Off she went to the only existing relative of her parents, her grandmother, who was a kind lady that had fallen prey to her bad luck not long after her arrival.
Next thing she knows, she's being shipped from one foster home to another, living a life of such uncertainty, she wished she might as well have been riding with her parents on that damned day.
Not long after her train of thoughts had started, she heard distant yelling and crying of a child not far from her bed. Times like these, where she lay alone in a hospital bed with a kid screaming not far from her, she wished she was with her parents instead. Sometimes she wondered. She wondered what life would've been if the accident would not have happened.
Would her parents have liked the way she was now? No.
Love was irrational, she reminded herself. The more you love someone, the less sense everything made. And she loved her parents dearly.
A sigh escaped her lips as a kind nurse opened the curtains of a window beside her, gave a tight-lipped smile and left the ward.
She started to feel claustrophobic in the small room, upset by the fact that she couldn't stare out of the windows the way she would've wanted to. The angry clouds had shown no mercy and were now weighing down on her, clamping, caging her in every sense. Her head spun wildly.
Just as she was about to slip into deep slumber due to her pain medications, the distant voice of the previous cries seemed to come closer and closer until the patient was gently lowered to the bed beside hers.
The patient was a small five-year-old girl whose name apparently was Sophia, since both her parents tried to calm her down from her constant crying. After what seemed to be a few very tiresome efforts and a promise of two tubs of ice cream as soon as she was discharged, the smile on Sophia's face returned. Only if life were that easy, she thought.
Bella wondered what her parents would've done if it was her instead of Sophia with an ankle sprain. Would they have brought chocolates? Or maybe storybooks?
She was brought out of her reverie when Sophia gently patted her bandaged wrist, "Did the monster hurt you as well?" Her innocent blue eyes were more curious than frightened.
Too overwhelmed by emotions, she didn't realise when tears escaped her eyes and eventually the uncontrollable sobs erupted from within her.
"I wish." Oh, how she wished it was some imaginary monster attacking her, and not the demons of her past.
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A/N: Hello again jellybeans!
Being hung up on your past is the worst thing you can do to yourself, so drag your sexy ass outta that bed, stop reading this right now (BUT you can always vote first :)) and go get a hug from your mama from my side!
What do you think Bella's problem is? Do you think her prolonged sadness is justified? Lemme know!
