Sleepovers - A Momojirou fanfic

14. Dealthy Loneliness

Jirou's POV

It's 5:26, I should probably be sleeping, but I'm nervous. I'm nervous that someone will die, get hurt, or worse, lose their quirk. I'm nervous that we'll end up even more heartbroken than we are. I know that these worries won't go away, if I push them down they will just come back up. Kind of like what happens when Uraraka floats too much, heh.

Maybe a song could calm my nerves a bit? I guess it's worth a shot. But what should I sing? I rummaged through my draws until I found a page of modified lyrics. I re-wrote this before the USJ, when I didn't interact with Momo and the Emo squad as much.

No matter how you live your life, you're breathing everyday
Depending on somebody else to lead you on your way
But even if they disappear, you're breathing all the same
'Cause all you'll do is drag along whomever keeps you safe

The people who I cherished and the people I forgot
Relationships came and went without another thought
Although I felt inkling this is not how things should be
I guess I really didn't know a single thing

School was toxic. That girl who I was friends with was toxic specifically, I don't even remember her name...

Whatever anyone may say
I know I've always been this way
As I avert my gaze away from bonds I've severed to this day

Even I cry when I'm alone
Even if nobody will know
'Cause deathly loneliness strikes on its own

For all the people's feelings that I threw off to the side
Although I know I needed them to keep myself in line
The punishment for running from my duty all those times
Has tightened all around my chest and now begins to bite

Before I know it, something in my heart begins to change
I wish I had somebody else to share my everyday
My body feels so numb as I succumb to prickling pain
I realize now that solitude is not a strength

Even though my parents supported my choice to be a hero, to this day I feel I've let them down, all of their free time has been spent teaching me, then I wasted it for a dream.

Whatever words I said out loud
I know there's no returning now
And yet again I tell myself "It's fine because it can't be helped"

No matter just how much I cry
No one will be there by my side
The cracks within my heart run deep with time

Every argument and fight is like folding paper. The affects are always there. You can forgive them and ignore them, but it breaks you.

So that it wouldn't break, So that I wouldn't break
Although my hands were shaking, I still tried to keep it safe
Oh what a simple feeling and I fail still to comprehend
I held too tight and it broke to pieces in the end

I glanced at my wrists, before continuing. I miss Momo.

Hugging my knees I cry in vain
Knowing that not a thing will change
No one will answer to my useless cries that echo in this room

Even the silence of the night
Even the veil of the moonlight
Won't erase, won't erase what I try to escape, and that's the truth

There's no way I can say all the words hid away
So deathly loneliness has followed me to this day

I sniffled, then someone knocked on my door.

"Come in." I told them as I put my guitar away.

"Hey, can't sleep?" Tokoyami greeted.

Yo! Yes, yes I am a Zelda fan. Anyway, this book will end soon, maybe in 3-5 chapters? I might fix up some errors in my chapters tho. Also I do not believe the song I used is the correct translation, it's just less wordy. Oh and if the link doesn't work search it up on YouTube or something, it's called Deathly Loneliness Attacks. I write to much... anyway, bye!